Fate & Forgotten Secrets: Outtakes
by snshyne
Summary: **COMPLETE** These outtakes are not essential to the plot, but are beneficial in adding to the overall character scheme. Deleted scenes and alternative POV's. A/H, A/U, OOC, M, Lemons, Language, & Canon Pairings.
1. Outtake 1

**A/N:**

**This outtake could feasibly be inserted after Chapter 6: Fusion and before Chapter 7: Chasm. It's not essential to the plot of Fate & Forgotten Secrets, but it fits nicely into the general scheme of the characters.**

**I don't own it, it owns me. Blame Edward. Or in this case of this outtake, blame Jasper.**

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**Fate & Forgotten Secrets**

**Outtake 1: Eureka!**

**JPOV**

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I hardly slept last night. I tossed and turned and paced through the early morning hours. Emmett's voice just kept running through my head:

"_When are you going to stop being such a pussy and give in to Alice Brandon?_"

His question completely caught me off guard. Emmett usually threw jabs at Edward and rarely harassed me about anything. If he ever did bring Alice up, I always successfully avoided having to answer. But this time, standing in his garage with Edward choking on his beer next to me, I somehow knew I would have to answer. I took a few more swigs of my beer and contemplated what I was going to say. _Am I going to do something? What am I going to do? Can I continue on in this game we seem to be playing? What do I even feel?_ Nothing was coming to mind.

"I'm not sure, Em."

"You need to fucking figure that shit out, bro. Alice doesn't deserve to be strung along like this."

I looked to Edward for support, but when my eyes fell on his face, I knew I wasn't going to get any.

"Em's right, Jazz. Alice has been after you for years. She's put herself out there for you so many fucking times. If you don't wake up soon, she'll fucking walk."

This isn't anything new. I've heard both arguments from them before. Except this time, they were laden with force and finality. The weight of their words fell hard upon my heart. I knew better. I knew I had to do something, but what direction to take I still wasn't sure. Do I give in? And what exactly am I giving in to? Or do I walk away? And if I walk away, what am I leaving behind?

I finished my beer then told the guys I was heading out. I was no longer in the mood to discuss cars and proposals or whatever screwed up sexcapade Edward had recently experienced. When I got to my condo I flipped the lights on and threw my keys into the bowl. Strolling to the bar, I grabbed the bottle of 18 Glenlivet Single Malt Scotch and poured it into an Anchor Hocking whiskey glass and tossed it back in one gulp. I sat the glass down while the liquor ran down my throat and warmed me from the inside. I took a deep breath before pouring another glass and walked over to the couch.

I all but threw my body into the leather, being careful not to spill the expensive liquor in the glass. I really didn't need something else to think about at the moment. I stared at the blank television, seeing my own reflection stare back at me. My mind was full of thoughts and none of them were coming together to help me make a decision. Frustrated, I looked down at my glass and realized it was drained. I walked into the kitchen and put the glass in the sink then turned to head down the hallway to my bedroom.

The hours passed by and I feared I was not going to be able to make the right decision. At some point in the night I was able to determine what my heart wanted, but my brain refused to accept it. I threw myself into bed unsure of how to reconcile the two. One thing was sure; Alice deserved better than what I was giving her or not giving her for that matter. But I still wasn't sure I could be the one to fix it.

Waking up the next morning, I scrubbed my hands over my face, trying to recall why I felt like shit. Beer, weed, whiskey, and avoidance. Sounds like a nice cocktail for disaster. Sitting up in bed, I glanced at my hands when my phone went off, alerting me to a text message.

_"Good morning, sleepyhead."_  
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_

_Alice. _My heart swelled and my breath caught in my throat. I get a good morning text from her everyday, but today something was different. It's at this moment my decision was made. Alice deserved better and I was going to give it to her. I wasn't sure how. I wasn't sure she would still take me, but I was going to try.

I called Edward and let him know I wasn't coming in today. The three of us were equals in _Eclipse_, but it's just common courtesy to let people know if there is a change in your schedule. Getting off the phone with Edward, I took a shower and got dressed before I made some phone calls that couldn't wait and then sat and thought about what my plan of action would be.

I knew Alice. I've known her for the better part of my life. But I have never been so nervous about anything in my entire existence. The day I met her, I remember being struck by her gumption and charm. I was eight and she was six. It was recess and all of the lower grades were outside on the playground. Edward and I were hanging out with some of the boys by the monkey bars. Some of the them were standing underneath the bars trying to look up the girls' skirts as they played. Edward got into a scuffle with one of the boys and was sent back into the classroom for a time out. I remained by the monkey bars just shaking my head at the vulgarity of the peepers when Alice strode over and kicked one of the boys in the shin. I laughed at the situation and she spun on me. Screaming about standing by idle is just as guilty as being one of the peepers. And then she smiled at me before she glided away. I couldn't believe it, this tiny girl just put me in in my place. She was right; I was just as guilty as those boys sneaking peaks at ruffled panties. I should have known from that point that Alice was always right. But I was eight. What could I possibly know about anything?

When I was in the eighth grade and Alice was in the sixth, she danced across the lunchroom one day and planted a kiss on my cheek, told me she'd wait, and bounced back to her table of girlfriends. I just stared after her, completely befuddled by her actions and her words. The entire table I was sitting with burst into fits of laughter until Edward and I threatened to kick all of their asses. I'm not the violent type, but I don't appreciate being laughed at so I would do what was necessary. And Edward, well he has a temper that he is _usually_ able to control.

That's how it was with Alice from the day I met her to the present. The older we got, the bolder she became. Declaring that we were made for each other and that one day I would see it too. She has just always been so sure, where I have not. To be honest, she kind of scares me. But in an exciting way. There is no doubt that I find her attractive. Alice is beautiful inside and out. Practically perfect. She's kind, graceful, assertive, intelligent, and oh so feminine. The truth is, I like everything about the way she looks. From her chin length, onyx colored hair to her piercing blue-grey eyes and pink lips, down to her tiny little feet and everything in the middle. When she smiles at me, my heart leaps and I'm almost positive it's been that way since the first day I saw her on the playground.

So as I sit here trying to decipher a plan to finally claim Alice as mine, I also have to wonder what the hell has stopped me all this time. In retrospect, I know when my heart started to move forward and left my brain behind. It was Senior year and it was prom. Alice was the only sophomore girl to attend and she did so on the arm of Darren Miles. I seriously hated that guy and to see her with him actually caused me physical pain. I remember getting very drunk and going home after instructing the limo to take my date home. It was hypocritical of me; I had a date. But I wasn't the one who said I would wait. She was. So I assumed her waiting was over. I knew that Alice dated over the years and the rational part of me said she had a right. But the primal side hated the very idea with every fiber of my being. I had no right to that hatred, but I couldn't shake it. Nor could I explain it. Probably because my brain refused to acknowledge what my heart already knew, leaving me in the dark.

But it's not her dating that stopped me. My own issues were the sole cause for my stupidity. Those same issues that caused me to take up a near permanent residence at the Cullen's. My parents. My father's abuse of my mother instilled a fear in me that I cannot even begin to explain. A fear that is so rooted into who I am as a man that it practically guides my every action. Sure, I've been intimate with women. I've dated. I've had short-lived girlfriends, but I have never allowed myself to get close enough to love. My father supposedly loved my mother and he beat her so badly her spirit was broken. She allegedly loved him so much that she let him do those awful things to her. I feared that if I loved, I would break the object of my affection to an unrecognizable shell of a person and I just could not let that happen. Even as I sat there, staring at Alice's text I fought an internal struggle to know I _could_ never and I _would_ never hurt her like that. But the 'what-ifs' still plagued me.

As I looked at the simple text message, a smile formed on my face and I knew for a fact that I loved Alice Brandon. I have loved her since I was eight years old. I silently kicked myself for waiting eighteen years to figure this out, but I knew I would make it up to her.

***~~~~~~***

The drive to Forks was miserable. My palms were sweaty and my body was twitching randomly. I had a few shots of scotch at my condo before I left to try and calm my nerves and it worked initially. But twenty minutes into the drive, my nerves won out and it only got worse the closer I got to Forks. I didn't know what I was going to get when I showed up at Alice's door. I wasn't even sure if she would be home. But I couldn't trust my voice to call her. Plus, I know Alice and I think she'd appreciate the sweeping gesture of spontaneous insanity. I looked over to the passenger's seat to see the pink Dahlia flowers I had to pay to be flown here today. The price gouging on flowers is ridiculous, but I know they are Alice's favorite so the price was worth it.

I pulled into her driveway, put the car in park and waited for a moment while I tried to catch my breath. After I realized I was as calm as I could possibly be, I grabbed the flowers and took a deep breath as I walked towards the door. Alice's Porsche was in the driveway so I knew she was home. And the lights in the windows downstairs were visible through the cracks in the curtains so I knew she was awake. I just hoped she was alone and receptive.

I reached the door and stared at the illuminated button for the doorbell. I raised my hand and lowered it several times, each time my hand was shaking more than the last. Finally, in one quick motion I rang the doorbell and jumped slightly as I heard it ring on the other side of the door. It took a few minutes, but it felt like hours, before I heard footsteps in the house. There were a few clicks on the door as the locks were opened. Then, in agonizingly slow motion, the door swung open. I looked at Alice and she looked at me. God, was she a beauty. She didn't say anything at first and I couldn't trust myself to speak. I mean, what would I say? "_Hi, Alice. Sorry I'm a blind idiot._" I was starting to think that this was a huge mistake, that coming here was not a good idea. I could feel my muscles start to tighten from the tension.

"I've been waiting for you, Jasper."

Alice's voice broke the silence and the tension in my muscles softened. I smiled at her and she smiled back.

"I know. I'm sorry. I'm here now. If you'll let me, I'd like to take you to dinner?"

"Silly, Jasper. Of course," Alice said with a giggle.

Her mood only served to relax me as she lead me into the kitchen, pulling out a large, crystal vase from the cabinet above the sink. She looked at me as she turned around and the smile on her face was an outward expression of the excitement and happiness that was nearly pouring out of her; the same happiness and excitement I felt. She took the flowers from my hand and started to artfully arrange them in the vase. I marveled at her swift and efficient movements. There were three dozen pink Dahlias and she paid gentle attention to each one, but it took her no time at all. When she was done, she buried her face in the arrangement and inhaled a deep breath.

"These are my favorite, Jasper. Thank you." I nodded because I was alarmed at how much her happiness could affect my own.

She came over to me and grabbed my hand, pulling me towards the hallway. She grabbed her coat from the closet and I assisted her in putting it on. She thanked me and I grabbed her hand, lacing my fingers with hers as we exited her house. Alice was basically skipping down the path to her driveway and I couldn't contain the smile on my face. Reaching the Range Rover, I opened the door and realized that Alice was not going to be able to get in by herself. Not in the skirt she had on combined with the high step.

Grabbing Alice by the waist, I lifted her into the seat as she squealed in excitement. I immediately felt a hardening in my pants at the contact and the sound, but I tried to ignore it. Tonight is not about that. Once she was settled in the seat, I shut the door and ran around to the driver's side to get in. The drive to the restaurant was fairly quiet. Alice hummed along to the music and I kept stealing glances in her direction. She wore a giant smile on her face the whole time.

We arrived at Kappo and if it was even possible, Alice became more excited. I thought for sure she was going to explode with it. I opened the door and hopped out while the valet took my spot and I walked to the other side to meet Alice as another attendant held the door open for her. The glow on her face was beautiful. I had to resist the urge to kiss her. Entering the restaurant, I gave the hostess my name and we were seated immediately. Kappo is one of the busiest restaurants in Seattle, but I was able to call in a favor with the owner to make sure we could have a table this evening.

Reaching our table, I helped her out of her coat and pulled out her chair while she sat down before I shrugged off my own coat and handed them to the hostess. I sat across from Alice and watched as her eyes danced in amusement. When her eyes settled on me, I found myself set into a trance. I never wanted to look away. I hardly noticed the waiter approach our table until he cleared his throat, signaling his arrival.

I ordered a bottle of sake for the table and we elected to order from the Omakase menu to allow the chef the honor of preparing his choices for us. I honestly had no idea what to say to Alice. She had always been the aggressor in our game and I'm not sure if that was because she likes it or if it's because I was too much of a chicken shit to do something about it. I decided I would take the lead now and see where we ended up.

"I'm glad you agreed to come to dinner tonight, Alice."

"Jasper, I told you nine years ago that I would wait."

I reached across the table and pulled her small hand into mine, running circles around her palm.

"I know you did and I kept you waiting for far too long. I wasn't ready," I said, gazing into her eyes.

"Are you ready now?"

"Yeah."

"Then that's all I care about," Alice said, appeasing some of my nerves.

From there it was just like talking to Ali, my friend. Except the spark of romance was finally double sided. As we talked, it amazed me how much she knew about me and how much I actually knew about her. I knew Dahlia's were her favorite flower, but I wasn't sure how I knew that. I just did. She knew my preference for muscle cars over tech cars even though she wasn't really into cars at all. I knew how she preferred her coffee, that she liked yoga more than palates, and was secretly harboring a lost love for the band NSYNC. It was like everything just rolled so easily between us. She knew me and I knew her. And yet, despite how much we knew about each other, it wasn't boring. I was thrilled to watch her eyes dance when she talked about the company she is working on starting. The determination in her voice stirring feelings in me I never thought I would experience. My heart warmed as I told her about different bands we were listening to for _Eclipse_ and the fact that she hung on my every word and even asked questions and provided an opinion.

Before I knew it, dinner was over and I was holding Alice's hand as we stood by valet waiting for my car. I slipped my arm around her waist, pulling her closer and she snuggled her head into my side and rested her hand on my chest. I didn't want this night to end. It just felt so perfect. Now that I had come to terms with myself. Now that my heart and my brain were on the same page, I wasn't sure I would be able to part with her. I knew I had to. Alice is a lady and deserves to be treated as such. She was my forever and I would have eternity to show her how much I love her.

The valet returned my Range Rover and I once again lifted Alice into the passenger's seat and then walked back around to the driver's side. Heading away from the restaurant, I heard Alice let out a deep sigh.

"Alice? What's wrong?"

There was a short pause. I looked over and she was fidgeting with her nails. Alice doesn't fidget. Bounce, yes. Fidget, no.

"It's just. I'm having such a good time and I don't want it to end."

"Me neither, darlin'."

"Then let's not end it." I couldn't be one hundred percent sure what she was saying and I wasn't going to assume. This would need to be her call.

"What are you saying?"

"I'm saying, take me home to your place instead of taking me to Forks."

I looked over at her then and I recognized the determined look in her eyes, but I also recognized a look of uncertainty.

"Are you sure, sweetheart? Because I don't want you to feel pressure from me. I would never do that to you. We don't have to sleep in the same room if you're just concerned about the long drive. It is late."

"Yes, Jazz. I'm sure. And the drive isn't the issue. I just want yo be near you. With you. I don't want to let you go."

"Alice, I am and always will be yours. I was just too blinded by my own foolishness to see it. Now that I have you, I can't let you go. But this has to be your choice, darlin'."

"I've made my choice, Jasper. I choose you. It's always been you."

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**A/N:  
Before you freak out, saying Alice was easy or whatever, understand that Alice & Jasper have been engaged in emotional foreplay for 18 years. That's a long damn time.**

**Leave Jasper some love!!  
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**Outfits will be on the blog & FFn author page  
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	2. Outtake 2

**A/N:**

**This outtake contains different points of view for Chapter 17: Confessions & Opportunities. It's not essential to the plot of Fate & Forgotten Secrets, but it fits nicely into the general scheme of the characters.**

**I don't own it, it owns me. Blame Edward. Or in this case of this outtake, blame Jasper.**

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**Fate & Forgotten Secrets**

**Outtake 2: Juxtapose  
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**APOV/JPOV**

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APOV  
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Looking down at the speedometer, I will my Pretty Purple Porsche to go faster. I know she can and I know I shouldn't, but I don't care. Something happened to Bella and it's imperative I find out what that something is.

Just thirty minutes ago I was straddling Jasper's lap in his office. The lights were out and the torso of my Dorothy costume was pulled down as Jasper's warm mouth roamed over my aroused nipples and my hands fussed with the waist line to his Scarecrow costume. We were both panting as the sounds from the music downstairs lowly thumped into our consciousness. The bass line to System of a Down- B.Y.O.B. was drumming beneath Jasper's feet, causing a slight vibration underneath me. I hummed and threw my head back as he pulled a taut nipple in between his teeth and I could feel him smile against my skin. I finally managed to snake through his costume and found his throbbing cock completely unconfined by the hindrance of boxers and moaned at the warmth in my hands.

"You feel that darlin'?" Jasper breathed out and my body shuddered at the sound. I love it when he calls me 'darlin', the southern drawl from his childhood evident. I simply nodded in agreement as he pulled my face to his in an impassioned kiss.

Between us I held his cock in my small hands, stroking slowly and focusing pressure on the tip with each upward stroke. I could feel Jasper's breath shake as we continued kissing like the oxygen in the room was running out and we had to share each others. His hand found it's way under the skirt of my costume and I felt his fingers stroke my wet pussy through the thin and barely there Carine Gilson panties I wore. I moaned in his mouth and he took the opportunity to bite my bottom lip with the perfect amount of pressure as his fingers slipped beyond the fabric and sought out my swollen clit. My hips bucked involuntarily and Jasper chuckled as his mouth moved back to my hardened nipple, flicking it with his tongue.

The pleasure was divine and I wanted nothing more than to feel him inside me. I gripped his cock with my hand and lifted my body using my knees against the cushion on the couch as leverage. Jasper realized what I was doing and he held my waist as added support. I pressed the tip of his cock against my wetness and we both moaned at the sensation. I teased him a little and I rubbed it back and forth over my slit, causing his hips to buck this time and now I was the one chuckling.

Just as I was about to slide down onto his glorious dick the door to his office shot open with a loud bang against the wall, startling me and I fell to the floor. The light flashed on and I looked up to see anger flash across Jasper's face.

"Fuck! I have been looking for you everywhere. Where the hell is Ali?" I heard Emmett's voice boom through the small space. Emmett's voice combined with the music and the headiness of what Jasper and I were doing was enough to put me into a tailspin.

"Damn it, Emmett! Don't you know how to knock? Why do you need Alice?" Jasper asked coldly.

"Because something happened with Bella Bear and Edward is taking her home."

"What?" I shouted as I shot up. "What do you mean something happened to Bella?"

"Shit, Alice!" Jasper shouted as he jumped up from the couch to shield me from Emmett. I completely forgot my top was down.

"Er...oh. She passed out or fainted or some shit. Edward caught her, but she wouldn't come to."

"Why didn't you come find me?"

Emmett's face turned into a scowl. "I've been looking for you for twenty minutes. I should have just come here first. But I didn't think you would leave Bella like that. I even tried to call both of you."

I looked down at my Charles David 'Spicy' pumps. Any excitement I felt was completely zapped at this point. I had left Bella. _But you left her with Angela_. I did, but still. I didn't even let her know I was leaving. I just left her there. Jasper reached around my shoulders and rubbed them soothingly, sensing how awful I was feeling. _Twenty minutes_.

"Twenty minutes? Shit. I have to go," I shouted as I brushed past Jasper and Emmett. I grabbed my purse and my coat and ran through Eclipse. I jumped in my car and ignored all civilized driving etiquette, weaving and speeding to get home.  
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She's with Edward. She's in good hands._ I kept telling myself that on the drive home. _His dad is a doctor; if something goes wrong he'll know what to do. He'd never hurt her. _

All of these thoughts I kept telling myself as assurance that Bella was okay. As a way to assuage my guilt for neglecting to at least let her know I was going upstairs. To stop myself from thinking about what could have possibly happened to cause her to faint. Sure, she had been drinking, but Bella is not one of those girls. She can hold her liquor with the best of them. So I doubt it was the vodka. _What if someone slipped her something? That's silly, Alice. Who would slip her something and then leave her while it took its effect?_ I couldn't turn my mind off. It was flying faster than I could keep track of.

Something is wrong. And I need to know what it is.

The drive from Seattle to Forks seems to be taking forever. I barely have my car parked when I hop out and run to the front door of my house. Just as I push the door open, I hear Jasper's Range Rover pull into the driveway.

"Bella! Bella!" I shout as I run into the house, instinctively towards the kitchen. I pause for a millisecond seeing Edward sitting at the island and Bella is across from him, swirling a glass along the counter. Running to her, I pull Bella into a hug, just needing to assure her, and me that she is all right. Repeatedly I ask her if she's okay. I look her over to see if there are any bruises or scratches, any sign that she's been hurt. Seeing nothing, I start to walk towards the front wall with Bella and see both Jasper and Edward standing there talking in hushed tones. They exchange a look between them before Jasper confirms that he is staying with me tonight and Edward is returning to Eclipse, basically to babysit Emmett. I make a mental note to ask them both about that look later and what it means.

Bella removes herself from my arm and I watch as she wraps her arms around Edward's waist. My jaw almost hits the floor. Looking at Jasper, he's smiling and that causes me to smile as our eyes meet. I truly realize that Bella is not afraid of Edward. That maybe having Edward around is good for Bella. Edward presses his hand into the hair down her back and I see a small smile tug at the corner of his mouth. Bella finally lets him go and I hop over to give him a kiss on the cheek for bringing her home and for a promise of a better Bella. I just know it. I step away from Edward and walk over to Jasper who has his hand out for me to take.

Bella remains in her spot almost as if she has grown roots and can't move. Watching her, my curiosity peaks. I can't stop from wondering what's going on in that head of hers. Jasper grabs my hand and places a warm kiss to the back as Bella turns and heads upstairs, excusing herself to take a shower. As she heads up the stairs, Jasper turns me to him and begins planting kisses along my jaw and my neck, leading his way to my mouth. I hear Bella's door close quietly and Jasper stops the kisses and looks into my eyes. What he's searching for, I don't know. But he's hiding something; I can see the mask as it moves in to cover the emotions that reside there.

Jasper grabs my hand and pulls me down the hallway towards the living room. I follow him silently; I trust him with my everything. I know that whatever he is hiding, we can get through. We reach the living room and I sit on the arm of the couch as Jasper takes a stance in the middle of the room. I wait a moment to see if he's going to talk. He looks like he is fighting with himself, not knowing where to start or where this will end.

"Jazz, what is it?" I ask him, figuring if I give him a place to start it will be easier on him.

"Ali, you need to talk to Bella."

I look at him quizzically. I talk to Bella all the time. "What do you mean? Bella and I talk."

"No, Alice. _Talk_ to Bella. Talk to her about what happened to her. What happened with Mike."

"I've tried, Jazz. She doesn't want to talk about it. She shuts down. Shuts me out. I don't know if I can," I trail off. More than anything, I want Bella to open up to me. But every time I approach the topic, she completely stonewalls me. What am I supposed to do?

Jasper stood in the middle of the floor, the internal struggle still raging. "Alice, Edward told me that Bella got some kind of text message and that is what lead to her collapse at Eclipse. Please, baby. Whatever is going on is tearing her apart."

"I know, Jazz. Don't you think I see that? Don't you think I know?" I was starting to get hysterical. Does he honestly think I can't tell Bella is even more damaged? I look at Jasper and his face softens. He walks over towards me and wraps his arms around my shoulders as I rest my head on his stomach. I can feel the hardened muscles through his costume and his steady breathing starts to calm my nerves. I know what I have to do. I have to try and get through to Bella again. Except this time, I can't soften when she starts to freak out. I have to stay strong. Jasper releases his hold on my shoulders and leans down to kiss my shoulder and then the tip of my nose.

"You can do it, Tink," he says, using his childhood nickname for me. "I have a feeling she's finally open to talking."

Jasper gives me a small smile as I stand up and grab his hand, heading back into the hallway towards the stairs. He walks behind me, grasping my hand as I walk upstairs towards Bella's room. I stand outside the door and take a few deep breaths before knocking and waiting for Bella to invite us in.

"Come in," I hear her call from the other side of the door. I push the door open and prepare myself for whatever may come my way.  
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It's now or never._

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**JPOV**

Alice is walking ahead of me and I try to focus on the swaying of her hips so I don't have to focus on the thoughts running around my in head.

When Emmett busted into my office, putting a hole in the wall with the door handle, I wanted to kill him. I wanted to kill him for his rude behavior and for interrupting my privacy. When he said he needed Alice, it never occurred to me in a million years that something could have happened to Bella. I was too wrapped up in getting off that I didn't notice the strain in his voice or the worry in his eyes. As Alice bolted from my office, Emmett told me that maybe Bella had too much to drink and needed to sleep it off. I grabbed my own keys and followed after her, pulling up behind her not long after she arrived.

Once inside the house, Edward and I had a short talk in the hallway. It wasn't _what_ Edward said, it was the _way_ he said it that alarmed me to the situation. Edward is a selfish and cocky bastard. His favorite person is himself. He doesn't go out of his way to make other people know he puts himself first, he just does it. So when Edward pulled me aside and told me that Bella was fine, that she wasn't physically ill, but was freaked out about a text message; I listened. I listened to the tone of concern in his voice. I watched as his eyes darted around out of confusion. I noted his protective body language while we stood in the hallway. Finally, I observed how he gently caressed her while she hugged him and how relaxed he seemed in that moment as his body involuntarily curved to protect hers.

Whatever happened to Bella to cause her to black out at Eclipse was enough to turn Edward from selfish bastard to protective hero and that is worth getting to the bottom of.

The issues plaguing Bella have been on everyone's mind. Alice has spent some time explaining to me details about their childhood together and how the death of Bella's parents affected her. She told me about the nightmares and the fact that Bella basically curled into herself. I remembered shy, clumsy Bella. Always a wallflower on the outskirts in school hiding behind the shield of her hair. I was too busy running from my emotions with Alice to really pay attention, but I remember enough to know that I knew then that she carried some baggage.

We're standing outside of Bella's door and I hear small noises on the other side letting me know Bella is still awake. Alice pauses and I place my hand at the small of her back for reassurance. After she knocks, Bella calls us into the room and as the door opens I want to cry out as I can feel the fear and anxiety radiating between the two of them.

Alice asks Bella what's wrong and Bella quickly denies anything is wrong. The dialogue is so automatic, I feel like they have done this dance before.

"Don't give me that. I know something happened. I know it has to do with Mike." I'm proud of Alice for not backing down when Bella tries to deny anything has happened.

"How do you..." Bella replies, completely baffled by how Alice could know that.

"Edward told Jazz about some text message. You're going to tell me now Bella. No more secrets. You can do this."

I silently watch the exchange as Bella moves to her bedside table to grab her cell phone and hands it to Alice, coldly telling her to read the text messages. It takes a few moments, but Alice let's out a strangled gasp like she was trying to take a breath and got punched in the gut at the same time. The sound bounces off the walls and lingers in the air, sending a chill down my spine. I go to excuse myself. I don't want to intrude on a private moment. It's more important that Bella gets things off her chest than for me to know the details.

"I should go," I say as I begin to tear myself away from the emotional scene before me.

"Please stay." I halt my movements as Bella's muffled please leaves her lips and touch my ears. I can barely hear her, but my heart responds, causing me to turn and walk to the chair in front of the window on the other side of the room.

I settle into the chair and watch as Bella braces herself for the emotional onslaught that is sure to follow. I focus my gaze on Alice, my precious Tinkerbell. I can sense the nervous energy radiating from her small frame. In this moment, I am so proud of her for putting a cap on that firecracker energy of hers. Surely, it would only serve to scare Bella further. I sit back in the chair and wait. Alice looks at me from the corner of her eye and I give her a small smile of assurance and she refocuses on Bella. We will wait together. I know we will sit here in silence for as long as Bella needs, but I seriously hope it's soon or Alice might explode.

The air in the room is ripe with anticipation, fear, anxiety, anger, and sadness. I glance at my watch and see that we've been sitting in silence for about forty-five minutes. I'm not sure how much longer Alice or Bella can stand this. I'm about to suggest I get some water or ask a question about the texts when Bella shifts in the bed and pulls her pillow closer to her body. Clutching it for deal life.

"I thought we were happy. I thought that what we had was where we were headed. I thought there would always be flowers, kisses, and presents. The flowers and the presents don't matter, but I wanted there to always be kisses. I really thought Mike was my present and my future," she stammers out after one giant breath. The longing in her voice when she talks about the kisses is almost heartbreaking.

Bella tells us how her relationship with Mike turned into a series of routines, from getting ready in the morning down to how they fell asleep at night on separate sides of the bed. How, over time, they stopped talking and being affectionate. How she thought Mike loved her and she couldn't figure out what to do to make him happy again, but she wanted to try. I look at Alice and I know she is my everything. I can't imagine not wanting to touch her every second of every day. I can't fathom not having the desire to make her laugh or see her smile. I realize that there is no way Mike ever loved Bella. Alice has her hands folded in her lap, patiently waiting for the rest. If I knew any better, I'd say they had this conversation before.

Bella lifts her eyes to look at Alice, but keeps her head down. She looks like a rabbit peering from its hole before venturing out into the dangerous, black night. "The night we went on that double date, the last one with Demitri, um...well, you and Mike had that argument and we left almost right after you. He was angry the ride back to the apartment and I tried to be silent. I had never seen him so furious. We got home and I thought it was over. I figured he'd go to the other side of the apartment and he could calm down. But he met me in the kitchen and stalked towards me like an aggressive predator. We had sex that night, but it was rough. There was no tenderness in his touches, no heart in his motions. Just rough. It didn't hurt really, but it had never been like that before."

My hands tighten their grip on the sides of the chair as I fight back the urge to let go of the anger boiling inside me. Her statements run through my mind on repeat. _'We had sex that night, but it was rough. There was no tenderness in his touches, no heart in his motions. Just rough. It didn't hurt really, but it had never been like that before.'_ Thoughts of my own mother start to come to mind. The nights I would hear her and my father in their room after some social event when he came home angry and she was too drunk to care. A woman is to be made love to. Cherished, worshiped, loved in the way she demands. Again, I look at Alice and the guilt is rolling off of her in thick waves, one right after the other. _I will have to ask her about that later_.

"It wasn't the first fight we've had. I know there were times where I would push him. Push him to get a reaction. Push him so I know he feels something, anything. Push him to prove I feel something. Because most of the time we were cohabiting robots," Bella continued.

Silence falls over the room and again we wait for Bella. My heart goes out to her for having to resort to less than favorable behavior to be able to feel the love she so desperately craves and rightfully deserves. And then to still not receive it is despicable I can hardly imagine what that must feel like, but _I know_ what it looks like as an outsider. Bella shifts on the bed some more and grabs her pillow so tightly, I am expecting feathers or cotton to pop from the seams any moment now.

Bella continues.

"The boredom and monotony continued. I wasn't myself. We went to _Eclipse_ to see _Steal Tease_ and I was so excited to be out. I was so excited to be able to have a good time. I did have a good time that night. It was as if things were starting to look better. I felt like Rapunzel being freed from the tower. When I got home that night, Mike was just acting so odd. Giving me strange glares and storming around the apartment. I made it a point to keep my distance from him as much as possible."

Bella takes a jagged breath, Alice's posture stiffens and something tells me that the shit is about to hit the ceiling fan. I close my eyes and take a deep breath, making sure it reaches straight to my toes. My lungs are grabbing at the air for any sense of peace to calm me. I open my eyes and almost as if she was waiting for me, Bella continues immediately.

"The next night, Friday night, we had a fight about some dinner event. He told me he needed me to go and I told him I couldn't because of a deadline that I had to meet. He was shouting at me that I had to go. That he expected me to be there. That my deadline was irrelevant. I had never seen him so furious."

Alice starts to inch closer to Bella. She moves so quietly that I hardly notice her motions except I see her hair sway in the moonlight through the window.

"Before I even knew what was happening, he was kissing me. Crushing me to him. I couldn't move or pull away. The air was being squeezed and sucked out of me. My lungs started to burn and I moved my face to try and get some air before they burst. I guess Mike didn't approve because he hit me. His hand slammed across my face and knocked me to the ground, causing me to bite down on my cheek and bleed. He had never hit me before. In that moment, I was so hurt and so confused and scared. I knew that it was my fault. I angered him. I should have told him I would go and make other arrangements to deal with the deadline. It was my fault I got hit."

Again I tighten my grip on the chair. He hit her and she feels like she deserves it. She feels like it's her fault. _What the hell did he do to her to make her think she is so undeserving?_ Bella is shaking now and Alice is almost to her side, still inching along. Alice chances a glance at me and I see the guilt in her eyes. She must sense the rage coursing through me because a small shudder runs through her body as she turns back to Bella. I try to focus on Alice, on the love I have for her. The happiness that lies with her instead of the anger building just below my skin.

"He grabbed and lifted me up off the floor and I felt my entire body go numb. My limbs were limp, my voice gone, my mind a glimmer of a memory. He started to kiss me and bite at my skin, whispering in my ear how heavenly I am. How much he loves my taste or my scent, telling me I'm delicious. I wanted to throw up. I couldn't see where I was going. My hair had been thrown in my face and my arms were pinned down so I couldn't push it out of my face. I remember soaring through the air, feeling my skin burn from the release of the vice grip of Mike's hands, and then my back hitting the mattress."

Alice is all but sitting on top of Bella as she reaches out to caress her hair. Bella is so lost in what she's saying, I don't even think she realizes Alice is there. I want to hold my girls-the love of my life and my new sister. But I don't dare move for even I am scared of my own anger at this moment. My mind is reeling and I just know that the worst has yet to come.

"He held me by the ankles with his hand while he removed his clothes. I don't know why I didn't try and run. I still had free use of my hands. Quickly, he was on top of me wrapping my wrists in his hand and shoving my legs open. He was pressed to me and any thoughts I had of running were lost. I was pinned to the mattress." Bella is shaking, almost violently as she takes a tighter grip on the pillow. She starts muttering things and her voice is hollow, empty. There is no spark of life. I fear she is going to have a psychotic episode. The fear is all to real after having been home to call 9-1-1 to save my mother from one of her own when I was seventeen. That was the scariest day of my life. Until now.

_"'Tell me you want it, Bella. Tell me!' _I remember him shouting in my face,_ 'Tell me!'"_

_"'Mike, please...please don't.'"  
_

_"'Awww, Bella, I won't hurt you. I love you. Tell me you want me, Bella.'"_

_"'I want you.'"  
_

_"'You're so wet. Do you feel how ready you are for me? It feels so good, Bella.'"  
_

_"I heard Mike yell out as his release came. My entire body shook under the weight of his while he trembled in satisfaction."  
_

_"'I love you, Bella.'"_

Bella stops her rambling and lets out a strangled cry as Alice takes a hold of her, muffling the sound when Bella's head drops into her shoulder.

He fucking raped her. The bastard. The coward. I fight with myself again. I want to hold them both and kill Mike Newton at the same time. Logically, I don't see how either course of action can be enough, but maybe if I combine the two? My jaw clenches and it feels like my molars are going to crack from the pressure. I am breathing heavily, my nostrils flared, as I mentally try to exorcise the demon of anger threatening to overtake me. I start to raise myself from the chair, I don't know if I can stay for the rest. I can feel the threats of anger starting to consume me like ruptured flames. I stop in my movements when I hear the defeated cries from Bella's mouth.

_"It's all my fault, it's all my fault, it's all my fault, it's all my fault..."_ Bella says in between horrific, guttural sobs. The sound is so painful to hear I feel like my ears are going to start bleeding to relieve the pain.

"Shhh, Bella. None of this is your fault," Alice tries to soothe.

Alice and Bella get into a disagreement because Bella insists that everything that happened to her is her fault. I listen as she blames herself for her parents death, the failing of her relationship with Mike, and something about me and Alice that I do not understand at all. I'm lost in my thoughts trying to understand what she means by what happened with me and Alice. Did I miss something? We had only got together shortly before this happened. What in the heavens is she talking about?

"What? Uh, he didn't rape me. I told him I wanted him. I let him do it," I hear Bella say, breaking me from my thoughts. My head snaps in her direction; surely she's kidding right? I look at Alice and she has a look of confusion on her face as well. Again, I ask myself, what the hell has he done to her to make her think like this? I recall a conversation with my mother on one of the rare occasions that she was sober. My mother once told me that the desire to be loved is so strong that a person will do anything to obtain it and keep it. That the fear of losing it is so weighted, you can be blinded from what is truly going on. I wonder if this happened to Bella.

"Oh God, Bella. Do you really think that? Do you really think that you _wanted_ him to do that to you? Do you think you really deserved to be treated that way?" Alice's voice, thick with emotion, breaks through Bella's sobs.

"I told him I wanted him. My body reacted to him touching me."

"No, Bella. You told him what he wanted to hear, trying to lessen the potential damage by not refusing him. You had already pleaded with him not to, but he wasn't stopping. You said it yourself 'Mike, please don't.' The physical reaction of getting wet is completely uncontrollable, sweetie. It can happen in pleasurable and fearful situations." Alice is doing so well, but I can tell this is killing her. She's trying to contain her emotions, but I can see the guilt, the anger, the fear, the hatred.

Alice reassures Bella that she and I are indeed happy. I could not agree with that sentiment more. I have never been so happy in all of my life. Alice completes me and I her. Alice's voice and confidence in our love aids in soothing my ragged nerves aching to break something or someone.

Bella starts to shake her head violently against Alice's shoulder. "What do you mean? You sent him away because of me. He was here that day in the hallway. The day after and then was gone. And I heard you on the phone that day telling him you miss him and that I was better, but you weren't sure how much longer before I would be able to be around people. And I remember the smile on your face when I said I wanted to cook dinner for Jasper. It's my fault he was sent away. Don't you get it?"

Damn! I thought I did well to conceal my anger that day. And it never occurred to me that if she did see it, she would think it was directed at her. I knew then that Mike had laid his hands on her and I figured she was just scared to be around someone she did not know very well. Sitting here, in this chair, watching them try and work through this, I know that Bella is not going to believe Alice. That I have to speak up. Be a man about it and explain.

"Bella," I call her name to get her attention. She removes her head from Alice's shoulder and looks at me, startled. For a moment I feel I scared her by speaking, but she relaxes slightly as I watch some of the tension leave her face and her shoulders and I continue. "I'm sorry."

"What? I don't understand. Why are you sorry?"

"Please, let me finish. I'm sorry I scared you. You didn't send me away, neither did Alice. I chose to stay away. I saw you when you showed up that night. I saw the bruises on your neck and the hand mark on your face. I saw the fear and defeat in your eyes before you passed out. I held your limp body in my arms as Alice willed you to wake up. The next day, I was drawn to your cries and screams as Alice tried to console you. I saw the sheer terror in your eyes when you looked at me and the scream that followed was enough to make my heart stop. I knew I had to keep my distance. I knew you had been through enough, but at the time I wasn't sure what _enough_ was."

"But, the way you were looking at me that day. You...it...I...it looked like you wanted to kill me. So mad."

I bolt out of the chair tried of feeling restrained in the confines and move to stand and stare out of the window. The only person I have ever spoke to about this has been Edward and even he only knows so much. I'm ashamed of it.

"Bella, I was not mad at you. I did not want to murder you. I would never even think of hurting you in any way. I thought I did a better job of hiding it, but I was wrong."

"Hiding what, Jazz?" Alice asks with a waver in her voice.

Taking a deep breath, I know I have to explain even if I don't want to. "My dad used to beat my mom. Almost every night for most of my childhood. Hell, he still might do it to this day." I hear Alice take in a sharp breath behind me and I hope to God she isn't going to judge me on this. I pray that she will still love me and not see me as any less of a man. "When I saw you that night with the bruises I was angry, but that pales in comparison to how I felt when I saw you awake and writhing from fear. I wanted to kill Mike Newton. If he had been home that morning when we got your stuff, I just may have done that. What you saw in my face was a reflection of my thoughts to hurt him worse than he hurt you. Only a coward hits a woman, Bella," I conclude and turn to look at her, trying not to show her that once again, I want to kill Mike Newton.

Bella starts to cry again and Alice continues to smooth her hair and try and calm her. I watch on the side still unsure of what to do. Alice's eyes meet mine and I'm not sure where her mind is; she looks weakened by the events of this evening. My little firecracker is fizzling out.

Involuntarily, I move towards the bed, trying to share some of my strength with the two women sitting there. Bella's sobs still echo in the room, breaking our hearts with every second. I slide onto the bed tentatively to test and see if Bella will receive me. When she doesn't move, I continue to move in the direction of Alice and Bella, having no idea what I'm doing. Bella shudders in Alice's grasp and instinctively I pull them both to me, shifting our position so that Bella is between us, cradled like a baby. Alice wraps herself around Bella and I wrap my arms around both of them, rubbing Bella's back and holding Alice's hand as Alice continues to stroke Bella's hair.

Before long, Bella's ragged sobs soften to harsh whimpers.

"Bella, why did you wait so long to tell me? And why tonight?" Alice asks softly.

"Talking about it gives it life. I want to forget. Or I want to die. I can't live it. I didn't want you to think less of me for wanting him. I wasn't going to ever tell you or anyone. But Edward asked me to try and something clicked."

Alice and I exchange a pointed look and we both tighten our hold on Bella, as if the pressure form the embrace can squeeze the memory and pain out of her.

"I will never think less of you, Bella," Alice says, as she places a kiss on the top of her head.

"You didn't want it. He used your fear against you. Please try and see that none of this is your fault," I tell her, trying to drive home the point that she is not at fault.

Eventually, Bella's harsh whimpers mellow out into soft breathing as she gives way to sleep.

I unwrap myself from Bella and Alice and leave the room, letting Alice know that I need some air. She nods and pulls the blankets up around Bella's chin and comes downstairs with me.

"Jazz, I'm sorry about your parents. I..I never knew."

"Shh, not tonight okay?"

Alice nods and wraps her small arms around my waist and I bend over to plant a kiss on her hair.

"Thank you. I love you," she says to me with a deep sigh.

"I love you too." And I mean that more than anything, but right now I need to get out.

Always knowing what I need, Alice lets go of me and walks to the door, taking all of the car keys from the dish by the entrance and turns to give me a small smile. "No one is going anywhere tonight."

_She knows me so well. _

Then she heads back upstairs to be with Bella and I turn to head outside for some air.

Sitting outside on the porch, I feel the chill of the late Autumn air ripping at my skin and I don't care. I want to call Edward or Emmett, but I won't. It's not my story to tell. And something tells me that Edward is not ready to hear this.

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**A/N  
See Alice's shoes on the blog and FFn author page**

**My babies are sad. Let them know how much you love them.**

_**Juxtapose- to place close together or side by side, especially for comparison or contrast.**_


	3. Outtake 3

**A/N: *EDIT for warning added*  
**

**This outtake is Mike POV from Chapter 9: Betrayal. *shudder* WARNING: There is sexual abuse & mild violence in this outtake. It's not graphic, but it's there. Please don't continue if this makes you uncomfortable. Like I said, it's Chapter 9 of Fate & Forgotten Secrets from the point of view of Mike Newton.  
**

**It's not essential to the plot of Fate & Forgotten Secrets, but it fits nicely into the general scheme of the characters.**

**I don't own it, it owns me. Blame Edward. After this, I need Edward to cuddle me.  
**

**

* * *

****Fate & Forgotten Secrets**

**Outtake 3: Dominion **

**MPOV**

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Walking down the hallway to my condo, thoughts of freshly baked dough and delicious sauces come to mind. Followed by a good fuck. So imagine my surprise when I walk into a completely dark and eerily quiet condo signaling that Bella is not home.

Completely unbelieving this fact, I go through each room looking for her thinking maybe she's asleep or maybe she's in the shower at the far end of the condo, which means I should be hearing her awful music blaring down the hall. But since I don't, I'm becoming more convinced that she's not here. When I see her nowhere in sight, I pick up my cell out of my briefcase to call her. No answer. I try again. No fucking answer.

Where the fuck is she?

I tear into the kitchen and grab a beer from the fridge and chug half of it in one gulp. Bella is practically always home. And when she's not, she's at work. I come home one day early to find that my girlfriend is not where I expect her to be. I'm fucking pissed. I want to know where the fuck she is and what the hell she's doing. I know that Alice is behind this. Bella would never even consider this kind of behavior on her own. She's a good girl. Always where she should be.

Or maybe not. She has been cold lately. Maybe she's been cheating or maybe she's trying to leave me. I'll get to the bottom of this shit. She can't leave me. I'll keep her forever or no one can have her. But I don't want her to end up like...

Never mind. I'm not bringing up that shit again. I check my watch; it's after midnight now. I've been home for over two hours. I've gone through three beers and two scotch and sodas and Bella is still not home. This just will not do.

Frustrated to hell, I grab my briefcase and slam it down onto the coffee table causing some of Bella's books to fall to the floor. I'm too pissed to care. Those are her fucking books so she can clean them up later. Settling down onto the couch, I pull out some of the files I had been working on over the week I was away. My exploits in New York had taken up some extra time and I fell a little behind in finalizing some of the contracts. I smile to myself thinking about how it was all worth it in the end.

Carmen always let me do things to her Bella would never allow or even consider. And this time she brought her friend Kate along with her. It was a fucking pussy free for all and my dick is already twitching for my next trip to New York for another round. Thinking of Carmen riding my cock while Kate rode my face or when Carmen and Kate played lick the pussy as if I wasn't even in the room; I had no choice but to stroke myself into oblivion. Do you have any idea how hot it is to see two sweaty female bodies writhing against each other? Fucking score. Shooting my cum all over their sweaty bodies and watching it drip in between them was a sight to behold.

The one time I brought up a threesome to Bella her entire body turned red and she bashfully declined. At the time I thought it was cute. It was early in our relationship and I figured I could work on her about it, amongst other things. But to my dismay she never budged on the threesome, letting me fuck her ass, or letting me tie her up. I had stopped seeing Carmen in New York and the other women in the various places I traveled, including Denise here in Seattle when Bella first moved to Seattle with me. But after about a month, I got bored and I had to scratch the itch.

I love Bella. She'll make a fucking fantastic wife one day. Her cooking skills are phenomenal and she can certainly give good head. I trained her well for that shit. I remember the first time my dick was in her mouth and how she had gagged and choked. Her eyes watered as I pounded into her throat and she even bit me once. But none of that shit is an issue any more. She's a pro.

Just then, I hear the door open and the sound of heels clacking across the floor. I look up just as Bella crosses into the living room with a large smile on her face. She locks eyes with me and a startled expression crosses her face. _Ha! Caught._ I look at her and notice she is all dressed up to the nine's. Dress, heels, hair all perfect, makeup bringing out her features. She never dresses like that for me. Granted, she didn't dress like a slob either. It was just always cute. Tonight, Bella is sexy. Who the fuck is she getting sexy for? Bella heads to the bedroom and comes back out a few minutes later mumbling something about do I need anything. I can't even look at her. I'm so fucking pissed I can shoot venom with my eyes. I just shake my head and she goes to bed.

I leave the condo and head out to where I know I will find Denise. She always hangs out at _Arctic_ on Thursday nights. I find her and waste no time getting what I want. I pull her out back and give her a good fucking against the wall. Pounding into her with all the anger I have at Bella. But it wasn't enough. Even after that I'm still on the wrong side of pissed off. We go back into _Arctic_ and have some drinks. Taking shots of Jack usually does something to calm my nerves, but tonight my buddy fails me.

"Fuck!" I yell, slamming the shot glass down on the bar. I can't fucking handle this. My hands are shaking. Right now I can either punch my fist through a wall or into the business end of some asshole's jaw. The last time I was this angry someone ended up hurt. Seriously fucking injured. Denise takes me back to her place and we fuck again and I pass out, hoping the dual release, alcohol, and sleep will do something to settle my nerves.

I wake up around three in the afternoon and I'm so fucking disoriented it takes a few minutes for me to get straight. Once I get my bearings the memories from the night before come back to me. I'm still angry, but at least I'm not shaking or seething from the core. I can go home now.

I enter my condo and it's not as eerily quiet as before, but once again Bella isn't here. I realize it's Friday afternoon and she's probably at work. Shaking my head, I go to the bathroom and take a shower. I realize this is a blessing in disguise; if Bella was home she could probably take one look at me and know what I've been doing all night. I don't have to explain that shit to her. I'm a man; I have needs that must be met. And I have too much work to do to waste time consoling her for some dumb shit.

Stepping out of the shower, I get dressed and head into the kitchen and grab a bottle of water. When I walk into the living room, I see Bella is there with a mug in one hand and a book in the other. Always with the fucking books. She should watch some TV and learn something about what's going on in the world. Reading dead poets was never good for anyone, but knowing who won _Celebrity Apprentice_ or _Rock of Love_ at least makes for good conversation.

I sit on the other end of the couch and pick up the remote, turning on the TV. I think I hear Bella sigh, but I can't be sure as the volume to the TV is pretty loud.

"Where were you last night?" she asks me, trying to talk over the TV.

"I should ask you the same thing," I respond back to her. She responds with a shrug. Is she trying to annoy me. "Well?" I say, fully expecting an answer.

"I went with Alice to _Eclipse_ last night. There was a band playing she wanted to see and asked me to go with her."

"Huh. That's convenient. Considering I was out of town and all. What else did you do?"

"What do you mean, what else did I do? I just told you," she barks back at me. I can feel my annoyance increasing and adding it to the hangover I'm nursing on top of the rage from last night, this is not good.

"Fine then. _Who_ else were you doing? And don't deny it. I saw the way you were dressed last night."

"I'm not doing this with you Mike. Not today. _Eclipse_ is a nice place. Alice picked my clothes. We watched the band, I got a CD, I came home." Then she tosses her book on the coffee table and storms into the kitchen, mumbling shit I can't make out.

I sit back on the couch and continue to flick the channels. The sun is almost set and there is nothing on TV so I settle on a sports wrap up on ESPN. About thirty minutes into the commentary, I hear the sounds of pot and pans in the kitchen. Bella is cooking. I stroll into the kitchen to see her bent over some of her work notes. She's cooking, but not for me. She's fucking working.

Seeing her there, I remember that my secretary told me I have a newly scheduled client dinner tomorrow night.

"I need you to be ready by seven tomorrow."

Bella spins from what she's doing and looks at me. "Ready for what?" she asks, her head cocked to the side, her arms across her chest. She takes her phone from the counter, looking at something before turning back to me.

"I don't have it on my calendar. Did you tell me about it before?"

"No. It's last minute, but the entire team is expected to be there and I need you to be there."

She gives me some bullshit excuse about having to work and a stupid deadline. Who the fuck is she to deny me? I'm Michael Luther Newton. I always get what I want. Something she must have clearly forgotten in the five days I was gone. I don't know why she has that stupid job anyway. What a joke. Who the fuck needs to edit cookbooks? It's not like they are real pieces of work. Just a bunch of ingredients on the page. My father laughed when he found out what she would be doing. Rambling on about 'respectable and dignified editing versus fluff jobs.' I can provide for her, but she insists on working. She'll change her tune when we're married.

"Fuck your deadline!" I holler at her, anger pouring out of me like a busted pipe. I can't control it.

I lunge forward, my lips finding hers and press her body to mine. Feeling her, tasting her, showing her that she can't deny me. I feel her struggling in my grasp, trying to get away but I won't let her. She breaks free from my kiss and instinctively I slap her, ending with her crashing to the floor. I've never hit Bella before. I never wanted to hit Bella. I stopped hitting women long ago after the last time. Almost appalled by my actions, I start to move towards her, but I stop in my tracks when I see the look in her eye. Bella is staring at me in pure defiance. Fucking challenging me. Something snaps.

She freezes for a moment, but then gets up to run. _Oh no. Not fucking today_. I reach for her just as she stands up and pull her tightly into my chest. She struggles for a moment before she gives up. Finally, she remembers who's in control here; that she belongs in my arms. I push her hair aside, breathing in her heady scent and licking at her sensitive skin. I want to fuck every inch of her. I can feel my dick grow in my pants; I don't think I have ever been so hard for Bella. I carry her to the bedroom. She's cradled in my arms and I whisper to her how heavenly she is, how I can't wait to feel her body under mine. Letting her know that she's not ever leaving me for another man.

Entering the room, I toss Bella onto the bed. My body is still cursed with anger and I hastily withdraw my belt and rip my pants down. Then I move to lay over Bella. "Please, Mike," she whimpered. Eager for my touch, wanting me. But I need to hear her say it. I need to know.

"Tell me you want it, Bella. Tell me!" I look down into her eyes; they're closed. I kiss them and she opens up, but she still hasn't told me. "Tell me!" I say forcefully one more time.

"Mike, please...please don't," she says barely above a whisper. I can't understand her irrational fear.

"Awww Bella, I won't hurt you. I love you. Tell me you want me, Bella," I say to her, brushing the hair from her cheek and placing a kiss on a solitary tear that just squeezed from her eye.

Recognition dawns in her eyes and she complies, "I want you." Music to my fucking ears. I kiss her soundly on the mouth as I thrust forward and enter her hot pussy.

"You're so wet. Do you feel how ready you are for me? It feels so good, Bella."

Bella has the tightest, sweetest pussy. Just as tight as the day I popped her sweet little cherry. And she is so wet; it's like heaven as I slide in and out of her dripping pussy. Her hot juices surround my hard cock as I slam into her. Pussy juices that flow only for me. Pounding into her so she knows that twat is mine. So she fucking thinks twice about ever considering leaving me for anyone else. At first, she lays still, enjoying my attentions, reveling in how good it feels. Soon I feel the ache in my balls grow and rest at the pit of my stomach before it stirs up again and I yell out as my hot seed pours inside of her juicy cunt, staking my claim. I feel her body shaking beneath me, responding to that good fucking I just laid on that pussy.

"I love you, Bella." I pull out and head towards the bathroom to wash up. "I forgive you," I call over my shoulder as I shut the door, so she knows that she is forgiven for her recent behavior.

Walking back into the bedroom, I see that Bella is passed out. Obviously fucking spent from the pounding I just gave her. Noting the time, I decide to head out for a few drinks and let her sleep that shit off.

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After a few drinks at The Barge, I head back to my condo, dragging my feet along the way. The alcohol and exertion are taking their toll. My thoughts are on Bella. How tight she is and how she wet she gets. By the time I make it back home, my dick is ready for another round. I hope to shit Bella has had a long enough nap or I'm going to have to wake her ass up.

Stepping over the threshold, I notice some of the lights are on that weren't on when I left. This must mean Bella is awake. I feel my cock immediately jump in my pants at that thought. I make my way down the hallway towards the bedroom, undoing my belt and unbuttoning my pants on my way. The excitement of fucking Bella again pushing me on.

Entering the bedroom, I see that she's not in bed. I check the bathroom and she's not there either. I find myself going through the same motions when she wasn't in the condo on Thursday, busting through the rooms to find her except this time my dick is hanging out of my pants. I stop in the living room as realization hits me that she's left. She fucking left. How could she fucking leave? After what we just shared. I can giver her everything. She's nothing without me.

I pick up a vase on the end table next to me and throw it towards the wall, yelling into the air as the glass shatters on impact and splinters towards the floor.

Fucking Alice! That selfish bitch, taking what's mine. She has nowhere else to go. She has nothing else. No one else. I should have taken her away from Alice years ago. No matter. I'll get Bella back. She can run, but she can't fucking hide.

I storm into the bedroom and throw some clothes into a duffel and leave my apartment. I need a few days to calm the fuck down. And when I get back, Bella is fucking mine. I'll find her and take her back.

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**A/N:**

**Bella did NOT have an orgasm. Read ch 9 again if you're confused. Mike is sick, so he thinks she did.**  
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Press that button below and let him have it!**


	4. Outtake 4

**A/N:**

This outtake could feasibly be inserted alongside Chapter 26: Dawning. It's not essential to the plot of Fate & Forgotten Secrets, but it fits nicely into the general scheme of the characters; especially Rose.

I don't own it, it owns me. Blame Edward. Always blame Edward.

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**Fate & Forgotten Secrets**

**Outtake 4: Overprotective**

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**RPOV**

"I love you, babe," Emmett says as I roll off of him.

"I love you, too," I say, kissing him one more time.

"Are you going to behave today?"

"Whatever." I get up out of bed and stroll into the bathroom to take a shower and get ready for today. We just had blissful sex; the fourth time since he picked me up from the airport last night. And he has to go and fuck it up with his bullshit questions. I miss him so much when I'm gone. I miss his corny jokes and his booming laugh, his grabby hands, his talented tongue and his strong cock.

Behave indeed! Like I'm some five-year-old brat in need of a firm talking to before daddy brings me out to see the guests. He should know by now that I just ignore those people who aren't worth my time. My time is valuable. I get paid a lot of money for my time. I don't have it to waste on those of little significance.

When I spoke to mom earlier in the week, she told me that Edward was bringing Bella Swan to Thanksgiving dinner. She was so excited about it. Going on and on and on about Edward finally bringing a girl home, implying that she is his girlfriend, and remembering little Bella Swan and how she used to hide under her mother's skirt. It stung like a bitch to hear this from my mother and not from my brother. I know we have our differences and that our relationship is highly explosive, but I love him and we share practically everything. And for him to not tell me this is like a fucking blow to the head.

And who is Bella Swan anyway? She was nothing important all those years ago and I'm sure that much is still the same. Lurking around the hallways in school in her too big hoodies and her chipped nails. Always staring blankly at nothing and everything at the same damn time. Just boring. Lifeless. And I saw her on Halloween, I saw the way she looked at him and the way he looked at her. It's impossible to miss when he kissed her. He can deny it all he wants, but I know it was more than helping a friend. I know him. There was energy behind that kiss.

Once dressed, I head downstairs to see if Esme needs any help. Although, I know I will only really be able to maybe chop some veggies. I know she is always somewhat disappointed that the domesticity gene skipped me, so I try as often as I can to be that daughter for her. It's not that I don't want to be good in the kitchen, I'm just not. Luckily, Emmett cares more about my bedroom skills than my kitchen skills. She gives me a sad smile and puts me to work taking the green, leafy parts off of the corn cobs. It's simple enough right? Apparently not because Edward swoops into the kitchen and pushes me aside, swearing at me about silken threads or some shit. The only silk I know about right now is the ribbon running through my thong. Esme gives me a sad smile and I leave the kitchen, letting Edward know how much of a fucking dick he is.

He stays in the kitchen with mom for most of the day and comes out occasionally, obviously on edge. Probably waiting for_ her_. Emmett told me that Edward is either a complete fucking moron or in total denial about his feelings for Bella because he has yet to act on them. I say both; especially watching him today. His hair is a tragic mess from running his hands through it all day and I want to grab some gel and put it under control, but I know that's pointless. His usually cocky and sure demeanor is lost to one of frantic pacing and jittery movements. It's fucking annoying. I've never seen him act this way. Not even when he was in the All-Star playoffs or waiting for his acceptance letter from Stanford. Nor when he was opening _Eclipse_ with Emmett and Jasper. Never. If this girl can affect him like this and he hasn't even realized his want for her, what is going to happen when he does? What if it doesn't work out? It will be so damaging for him and I can't let that happen.

Edward's sextracurricular activities are disgusting, but I never really worry because his heart isn't in it and there is no chance of him getting hurt. I know girls. I know how much they lust after his pretty face. They all want to use and abuse him. Get into his pants or his wallet. I've heard the 'locker room' talk most of his life. I see the girls stare at him every time we're in public. Even some of the girls I work with, who have met him, just want a chance to scent his sheets and move on. I have always feared the day he would get too involved with a girl and she would ruin him. You bounce back from heartbreak, but it always leaves you less of a person. Edward's an ass, but I love him just the way he is! That's all there is to it.

The doorbell rings and Edward all but runs to answer it. I roll my eyes and Emmett gives me a cursory look. Apparently, I'm being watched even though I'm not the frantic fool burning pace marks into my parents' carpet. I flip him my favorite finger and he chuckles and turns back to the game.

Alice glides into the living room and plops down onto Jasper's lap, giving him a fevered kiss and running her hands through his hair. "Get a room," I shout over to them. Seriously, we don't all need to be privy to their game of tonsil hockey.

"I know you aren't talking to us, Rosie," Jasper says, "I'm pretty sure Emmett was practically dry humping you down by the pool table earlier." Emmett laughs and slaps his knee and I can't help but smile either.

"Maybe. But I haven't seen him in weeks. Alice lives forty-five minutes away from you."

They both shrug and Alice turns to the side, looking bored at the TV.

"Where's Bella Bear?" Emmett asks Alice.

"She's getting the grand tour from Edward."

"What took you so long? I thought you were coming closer to noon?" Jasper asks.

"Yeah, well, Bella insisted on making this flaky nipple desert thing or something and she was all in a tizzy about it. I guess the creamy stuff wasn't getting hard fast enough. Really, you'd have to ask her."

"Napoleons?" I ask.

"Yeah. That."

"Edward's favorite desert." Emmett, Jasper, and I all say at the same time as more of a statement than a question.

"Uh huh," she shrugs before snuggling down further into Jasper's lap.

Huh. She's even better than I thought. She's fucking baking for him now? Before the night is over he'll be eating her for desert at this rate. Great. She'll definitely have her hooks in with this trick.

We sit for a while and the guys continue to watch the game. I get up to go and see if I can find my brother and his new flavor of the season, but Emmett pulls me to him as I pass and starts to tickle me in a frenzied fashion. I can't stop laughing hysterically. Then he kisses me deeply and passionately and I forget what I was about to do while I get lost in his touch.

"Now who needs a room?" Alice giggles. I just wave her off and continue to kiss my man. I leave tomorrow. I need all the kissing I can get.

Before long, Kate comes to tell us that mom said dinner will be on the table in a few minutes and to wash up and start to make our way to the dining room. I always laugh at her need to remind adults to wash up. It's so Esme Cullen; always thinking of the little things. I detach myself from Emmett and head to the bathroom, realizing that Edward has yet to resurface from his tour guide duties. Honestly, how fucking long does that take?

When I enter the dining room, almost everyone is seated except my parents and Kate, and I take my seat between Esme and Emmett, watching Bella as I sit down. She doesn't appear thoroughly fucked or even licked and Edward still appears on edge, so I doubt that anything like that went down. But she wishes it had, I can tell. I watch as her eyes wander to his hands while he handles his utensils. I see her staring at his mouth when he talks, the lust that clouds her plain brown eyes. I also see the mega-watt smile that graces his face when he looks at her. He's in deep and he doesn't even know it.

I listen as she chats with my mother and gleans a look from Esme that I can't even remember the last time I've seen. The excitement and pride is evident as they talk about fucking food. Things that I just don't even really understand. It's not that mom disapproves of my profession. She actually is very supportive and always has been. But I'm her daughter and we don't really share any of those mother-daughter things like cooking or knitting or whatever. So watching her talk to Bella, I feel like I've cheated my mother on something some how. I feel really fucking awful. She's barely talked to me up to this point. I can't help but wonder if she's secretly thinking she wished Bella was her daughter instead of me.

"Babe, cool it," Emmett whispers next to me.

"What?"

"Stop glaring at them. There's nothing to freak out about. They're perfect for each other."

"You guys hardly know her!" I'm still whispering and trying not to shout. "You're all blinded by her wounded mouse routine."

"Just drop it, Rose."

"No. It's fucking pathetic. Look at her," I say, looking over at Bella, shielding herself behind her hair and biting her damn lip.

I turn back to my plate in a huff when Edward speaks up. "Perche' devi essere cosi' stronza?" Did I hear him correctly? Did he just call me a bitch?

"Excuse me?"

"You fucking heard me. Why do you have to be such a bitch?"

"I'm not gonna watch you run around with some plain, boring girl and get hurt or hurt her in the process." I seethe at him. Ugh! He's just so fucking stupid sometimes. Boys and their dicks.

"Rosalie, that's enough," I hear my mother say as she reaches out to pat my hand. I snatch it away in aggravation. Of course she wants to defend her long lost daughter.

"'Some girl?'" Edward is almost red with anger. The lines of his jaw are clicking with the tension in his body. He tugs on his hair aggravated, taking a few deep breaths through his nose. He is _mad_ at me.

"Son, please, just stay calm." Dad tries to stop the volcano that is about to erupt and Bella hops out of her seat, running out of the room. Alice follows and throws me an evil look as she leaves the room. Kate, Alistair, Garrett and McKenna all leave as well. Undoubtedly to give us a moment. Edward's temper is something of a legend in the house. It doesn't happen often, but when it does, it's not really pretty. Well, as pretty as a disaster can be.

"Do you see what your needless bitching has done? Are you fucking happy now? She's probably a fucking mess now."

"Se si offende cosi' facilmente non dovrebbe essere qui!" I shout as him as I jump from my seat.

Edward follows suit and jumps from his seat so fast he knocks his chair over, causing the chandelier to shake and Esme puts her face in her hands. Probably praying we don't kill each other as well as the chandelier. "Non capisci un cazzo. No hai la piu pallida idea di che ha sofferto. Non la conosci! Just because she doesn't meet some pretentious, stick up your ass, pampered bitch-model standards, you think you can judge her?" he shouts at me. The anger causing his otherwise smooth voice to sound deep and menacing. "I invited her here. You have no fucking right, Rose. Fucking none."

I go to respond, but Emmett pulls me down to my seat. I look at him and he's glaring at me. He's pissed too. Edward leaves the room and everyone starts talking at once.

"You know, Rose, you could learn to be less of a bitch to people," Jasper says as he dashes out after Edward.

"Rose, I thought I raised you better than that. I can't believe your behavior towards a guest," Esme chastises.

"What the fuck was that, babe? Where the hell did that even come from?" Emmett asks, squeezing my hand.

"Rosie, bambolina," Carlisle says, pinching the bridge of his nose. I think he's too frustrated to even attempt to talk.

Why is everyone mad at me? I just sit back in my seat, preparing to get the disapproval speech from three of the four most important people in my life. Words fly at me...

"What do you have against Bella?"

"Why would you behave like that at the table?"

"Can't you see your brother is happy?"

My head is spinning. Too many questions. I zone out, letting them talk _at_ me. Why can't anyone see that I only want the best for him and I'm not convinced she is it? Sure, there is now the added jealousy of her connection with my mother, but that's not the root of it. I just...ugh! It's so frustrating.

"Shut up!" I shout out to get them to stop talking _at_ me.

"I'm sorry," I say more to my mom and dad than Emmett. I tell him to shut up all the time. "It's just you're all talking _at_ me and I can't stand it."

"Babe, what if Edward had vetoed this?" Emmett asks, gesturing between me and him.

"He wouldn't."

"But he could have. He still can, but he hasn't. What if he did? How would you feel?"

I have to think about it. Would he? Could he? If he did, I would die. I know it. Emmett is my world. My everything. The short time we were apart during our college years because of his infantile stupidity was impossibly hard. Emmett would do the honorable thing and honor my brother's wishes even if it killed him. But Edward wouldn't do it. He knows how much Emmett means to me.

"It's different. We've been together for years, he wouldn't do that now."

"Bimba," Esme starts, "he wouldn't now, but what if he did then? He would have thwarted your chance at happiness with Emmett. You wouldn't have had this chance. You have to give him the chance to find out for himself if this is what he wants."

"I know you want to protect him, but he's a big boy, Rosie. Let him decide."

I'm not sure if I can. I...just...I sit here and say nothing.

"You need to apologize." Esme, always with the formalities.

"I can't do this now. May I be excused? I'm going to bed."

My parents nod and I tell Emmett he can stay and eat. I know he'll just be crabby if he doesn't get his hands on five helpings of my mom's homemade stuffing. I get upstairs and change, flopping down on my bed. I'm tired. I've been in Milan for close to three weeks; it's late there and my body is still on that time.

My father's words ring in my head, "_...Let him decide._" I'll try.

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**A/N**

**Outfits will be on the blog & FFn author page**

Translations

_Perche' devi essere cosi' stronza_ - why do you have to be a bitch?

_Se si offende cosi' facilmente non dovrebbe essere qui_ - if she can't handle it, she shouldn't be here.

_Non capisci un cazzo. No hai la piu pallida idea di che ha sofferto. Non la conosci_ - You do not understand shit. You have no idea what she's suffered/been through. You don't know her.

_Bambolina - _small doll it's endearment in italian like calling someone a beautiful doll  
_Bimba_ - literally means girl. Italian term of endearment for a daughter.


	5. Outtake 5

**A/N:**

This outtake could feasibly be inserted around Chapter 27: Move Forward, Step Back and Chapter 28: Guilt Ridden. It's not essential to the plot of Fate & Forgotten Secrets, but it fits nicely into the general scheme of the characters.

Bella mentions several dates that she has been on with Edward:

_We went to another cooking class that was about meatballs and Edward got into a roaring argument with the instructor about the proper way to make meatballs. The argument was mainly centered around the fact that the instruction required breadcrumbs and Edward insisted if you made them right, you didn't need breadcrumbs to hold them together and that breadcrumbs ruined the meatball consistency. A lot of swearing, several strong Italian words and phrases, and perfect Edward-style meatballs later, we left. Needless to say, it was hot and I don't think we'll be going back to Blue Ribbon any time soon. At least not for anymore meatballs related instruction. There was lots and lots of kissing that night. Kissing and delicious grinding friction. But he always stops!_

Translations will be available at the bottom

thanks to cclore and PhoenixMP3 for their beta love.

**Disclaimer- I don't own it, it owns me. Blame Edward.**

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**Fate & Forgotten Secrets **

**Outtake 5: You Call Those Meatballs? **

**Edward Cullen POV**

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Taking a glance in the rear view mirror, I can't help but smile to myself as I'm on my way to pick up Bella. I'm pretty fucking happy about it. She called me yesterday to see if I wanted to go to another cooking class at Blue Ribbon tonight. I figured, why the fuck not? We had fun the first time around. Except this time, there was no arguing about me picking her up. I had planned to see her, but hadn't really decided what I wanted to do yet. This whole seeing a girl more than a few times outside of my bed or hers, otherwise known as dating thing, is a new fucking experience.

I pull into Bella's driveway and before I can even get out of the car, she's hopping down the stairs and heading towards me. Someone is excited today.

"Hi!" she squeals, stopping right in front of me.

"Hey, baby. How much caffeine have you had today?"

"Not much. Maybe. I'm not sure. I lost track. I was busy working on those final edits. I wanted to get it done before tonight." She stands up on her toes and I lean down to kiss her lightly.

"You're cute. Let's go." She laughs as I open the door and she slides in. I shake my head as I walk to the driver's side, laughing at myself for calling her "cute."

The drive back to Seattle is pretty smooth and Bella tells me about finishing the final edits on David Aveeno's cookbook and sending it to her boss for approval. It's the first one she's completed on her own and she's very excited about it. I don't think anything could put her in a bad mood tonight.

We get to Blue Ribbon and it's all Bella can do not to hop out of the car. It's fucking cute, really. I like when she is this ball of energy. At this point, I bet she could put Alice to shame. She's happy, and I'd have to be a royal fucking asshole to not find the good in that.

"So tonight's class is about meatballs," Bella starts as we walk down the familiar hall, "it's not something I have an issue with, but I kind of like to make meatballs. It's like an excuse to play with your food," she concludes. When she looks at me, there is a small sparkle in her eyes and I smile at her excitement; that shit is contagious.

There's not much to say. Bella wants to make meatballs; we can make fucking meatballs. Though, I could easily make her some meatballs at her place or mine, but if she wants the class, we can take the damn class.

Just like before, we hang up our coats and make small talk with the other attendees. Bella ties on her adorable as shit apron and smiles at me just before she makes a bee line for the same chef's station we sat at before.

I stride over next to her and she's already started to wipe down the surface, which is hilarious because that's what I did the first time we came here.

"Don't gape at me. You did this last time," she says as she tosses the wipes in the trash and moves to wash her hands. I simply shrug and wash mine, making sure they're clean before I touch anything.

I settle down onto one of the two stools and pick up the instructions that are laid out on the table. The first is a notice about sanitation and cleaning up after yourself. It's the same notice from the first time. The next sheet, which is a fucking obnoxious shade of orange, is an advertisement for a few future classes. It chaps my ass that they spelled "bolognese" wrong by adding an extra "n" and dropping the final "e." Some fucktard idiot must have typed this up. He was obviously sitting at a computer; he could have Googled the correct spelling.

The final paper is a light blue sheet that lists the ingredients, as well as step-by-step instructions for the "Make Your Own Meatballs" session, as it says at the top of the page in a font I can only describe as child-like.

"Breadcrumbs? Are they fucking kidding me?"

"What?" Bella asks as she comes over to see what I'm looking at.

"Breadcrumbs. They want us to put fucking breadcrumbs in the goddamn meatballs. That is just...just...seven ways of fucked up."

"There has to be more than one way to make meatballs, right?"

"Sure. The right way and the wrong way. This," I say, pointing at the paper in my hand and ingredients on the table, "is the fucking wrong way."

"Is there a problem, sir?" The portly kitchen facilitator asks as he waddles over. It's not the same guy as the last time.

"Yes. What the hell are you trying to teach these people? My Nonna would roll over in her grave if she saw me using fucking breadcrumbs in meatballs."

"Sir, this is the tried and true method for making meatballs."

"Excuse the fuck out of me. According to whom? No _real_ Italian chef would be caught dead putting breadcrumbs in their meatballs. Hell, no self-respecting lover of Italian food would do it either!"

"Well, sir, you can choose not to use breadcrumbs if you want. However, those are the instructions for the class."

I just glare at his fat bald head as he walks away. _Cazzo di cuoco_. I turn to look at Bella and she's giggling behind her hand.

I just crumple the fucking instructions in my hand and toss them in the trash under the counter.

"Uhm, Edward, don't we kind of need those?

"Fuck that! We're going to make meatballs _come Dio comanda_. The right fucking way."

I wash my hands again, absolutely fucking disgusted by that offensive sheet of paper I just held moments ago. Bella can no longer contain her laughter as she bends forward, clutching her side and I can see her shoulders shaking.

"Baby, _non e' cosa da ridere_! They're going to instruct people on the art of butchering meatballs."

"O-o-o-kay, E. We can..." she tries to say while laughing, "we can do it your way."

"The right way," I say matter of factly and she nods.

Throughout the class, Mr. Douchebag with the sausage fingers does well to steer clear of our station. Only passing by quickly on a couple of occasions, but never saying anything.

I'm muttering to myself, some things in English, some in Italian. I say a silent apology to my grandmother, Esme's mom, for this fuckery. '_Scusa, Nonna, sto' scemo non sa niente della cucina Italiana.'_ She'd die all over again if she thought I was using breadcrumbs in my meatballs.

Bella and I work contentedly side-by-side until some asshole bumps into her, causing her to smush a couple of the meatballs she's been rolling. Mr. Pillsbury Motherfucking Doughboy waddles over and tries to chastise my girl, saying that if she had used breadcrumbs, her meatballs would not have crumbled. Then, he has the fucking balls to shoot me a scathing look.

Is. He. Fucking. Kidding. Me? _Vuole morire di vergogna_ is the only explanation. He wants to die of embarrassment! Well, bring it!

First, huge fuck up in the meatball instructions. Second, you talk down to my girl? We're just going to ignore the third infraction of that scathing look bullshit because you only get one fucking chance, and this shit has gone on long enough.

"_Ma chi cazzo ti credi di essere?_ Maybe if you paid better fucking attention to your students in this class who actually _need_ your bullshit advice, you'd notice that her meatballs fell apart because this asshole bumped into her, causing her goddamn hand to land flat on the balls she was rolling. Breadcrumbs have shit to do with it."

"Here, I'll show you." I walk over to the table where the asshole who pushed Bella is and put my hand into one of his misshapen, breadcrumb balls and make a shocked face when it goes flat. "Fucking oops."

Several people in the room, including Bella, laugh. Mr. Portly in the White Hat scowls and tells me to behave or I have to leave. I'm fucking fine with that, except Bella wanted to do the damn class. So I go back to my seat and shut the fuck up so she can enjoy it. Besides, we're making meatballs the right fucking way anyway.

By the time our meatballs are done and cooling, I've told the annoying, wanna be chef dude off two more times and have managed to kiss Bella five times. She keeps giving me this look, and it's fucking hot when I catch her and she bites her lip and turns away with a blush. I'm pretty sure that blush saves Dudley Can't Fucking Cook a serious verbal ass kicking.

I spear a meatball with a fork and hold it out for her to bite it, which she does, and the sight goes immediately to my dick. Like I knew it would. That, combined with the "mmmhm" sound she makes just about does me in. Like it usually does. I bite the rest off the fork while I force myself to not bend her ass over the fucking counter. Given the way I feel right now, it would be all sorts of aggressive and Bella doesn't need another asshole forcing himself on her.

The idiot in the chef's hat, as if that hat seals his credentials or some shit, rolls over to our table after walking around to the others to check their progress. I push the platter forward and lean back, crossing my arms over my chest. I watch as he lifts up one of my balls with a new fork and examines it. _Fucker_. I dare him to say some shit.

Then he smells it like this is some kind of prerequisite for good meatballs. He's stalling because I'm right; mine are better and he fucking knows it. He takes a bite and chews slowly. I roll my eyes and I'm about to say something, but Bella speaks first.

"Well?"

"These are very good. Where did you learn to make them?" he asks, eyes wide and tongue basically wagging because that shit is awesome.

"It's a family thing, but you can keep the leftovers," I say, grabbing Bella and getting our coats to go. We aren't staying to clean because I already did that shit as we went along. Bella giggles as we move to leave. As we're walking out the door, she laces her small fingers with mine.

"That was quite a show, Edward. I think I might have to make meatballs with breadcrumbs when I get home."

I look over at her and she's wearing a devilish smirk. I spin her around and push her against the wall, leaning over her while she looks up at me through her lashes.

"Are you trying to piss me off?" I ask, my tone not nearly as menacing as one might think. I can clearly see she's fucking with me. She nods. "Why?"

"It's fun," she says, then ducks out from under me and runs to the exit. I chase after her at half speed, down the empty hall, her squeals echoing in the night once we get outside and to my car. I kiss her soundly against the door frame and she drags her hands through my hair.

We break apart, both of us panting, our breath like smoke in the cool winter air. I help her into the passenger's side, then I get in and we drive back to Forks. The lingering taste of Bella's lips on my mind the whole way.

Getting to Bella's house, we walk hand in hand to her front door. I'm not really sure where that development came from, but it's usually Bella who reaches out for my hand and I'm hard fucking pressed to deny her that shit. I stand behind her as she unlocks the door, and I can't resist leaning down to kiss the shell of her ear that's now visible after she tucked her hair behind it. Bella shivers noticeably, then turns her head and kisses me softly but lingers for a moment as she pushes the door open.

To be honest, I should probably fucking go home. I have a lot of energy running through me and Bella is being all cute and shit. Just thinking about chasing her to the car and having her pinned against the door is enough to make me go partially insane. I don't trust myself with her right now.

"Uhm, I'm kinda hungry. Stay and I'll make us something?"

I already know the fucked up answer is yes, like I could say no. Like I'd _want_ to say no. I should say no, but I won't. So I nod and she heads over to the coat closet. She hangs up hers and I hand her mine, then stand behind her and place my hands on her hips, the scent of her fills my nostrils now that she is no longer surrounded by the thick wool of her coat.

"Did you have fun tonight?" I ask, wrapping my arms more fully around her waist. I can hear the lust in my voice and I wonder if Bella can hear it too.

She nods.

"Sorry for being such an asshole about the breadcrumbs." I'm not really sorry for being an asshole to the fucker, but if she is upset by it in any way, I am sorry for that. I kiss her softly behind her ear and on her neck, and she brings a hand up to rest it against my cheek, holding me there.

"It's okay. I liked it," she says softly, turning in my arms to face me.

I just quirk a brow at her. She's looking at me shyly, biting her lip as a blush tints her cheeks. That fucking blush is like kryptonite to my Superman. Without any kind of forethought, I pull her closer and stifle a groan when the throbbing dick in my jeans hits the plane of her stomach.

"It's...uhm...it was hot or whatever."

She looks up at me then and I kiss her, just capture her lips in mine without any hesitation. She immediately wraps her arms around my neck and holds me to her, kissing me back just as hard.

Next thing I know, the fucking back of my knees are up against something and I'm falling backwards, stopping when my ass meets the damn bench in the hallway. It breaks us apart, but clearly Bella is undeterred because she climbs into my lap and fucking straddles me, then replaces her lips on mine so we can pick up right the fuck where we left off.

She feels so fucking good. So warm and soft and the heat between us is making the scent of her skin more pronounced. She starts to shift her hips, grinding against me. I know I should stop her; I know I should get her off me, but I won't. I'm a selfish motherfucker and I let her continue. But what kind of person would I be if I let her do all the fucking work by herself?

My hands find her hips, and instead of pushing her away or holding her still, I help her. I guide her in a steady rhythm and start to shift my own hips, growling at the sensation of her heated pussy against the bulge in my jeans. The heat is radiating and at one point, I errantly wonder if that shit could burn. Stupid I know, but all my blood has left my brain anyway. At the moment, I cannot be held responsible for my fucking thoughts.

Bella moans and her teeth come down on my bottom lip. I'm pretty sure my eyes just roll into my head at the sound. Fuck! If that's not the hottest shit I have ever fucking heard.

She runs her hands through my hair, pulling her lips away from mine as she throws her head back. I lick at her neck, nibbling lightly at her skin and some kind of incoherent sound comes out.

"Oh, please. Don't stop," she says breathily and something clicks in my brain. All I hear is "stop."

She wants to stop. _Stop!_

"Bella?" I try and say, but I barely recognize my own voice. She's not responding and I'm pretty terrified that I'm going to hurt her or push her too fucking far.

It takes every fucking ounce of control I have left to force myself to grip her hips firmly and make her stop. It takes a moment, but she looks down at me. Both of us are panting and clearly lost in a haze of lust.

She goes to move away from me and I let her. She stands there for a minute before walking into the kitchen, presumably to make something to eat, which is why I am here anyway.

I stay on the bench a moment because the look I just saw on her face, I can't make sense of. Is she mad? Is she hurt? Fuck! I still want her, and I can't talk to her until I get _both_ my heads under control.

A few minutes later, I walk into the kitchen and see Bella chopping up some vegetables.

"Bella?"

"Can you chop the chicken?"

"What?"

"The chicken, Edward. I figure we can have stir fry. I have these fresh veggies and the chicken is already thawed."

"Uhm, okay. Do you want to-"

"Thanks!" she says, cutting me off and walking over to kiss me before going back to chopping her vegetables.

I sigh and chop the chicken, just like she asked.

By the time we finish eating, Alice is home along with Jasper in tow. Bella seems fine. We're all hanging out in the kitchen and she's sitting on my lap, her left hand is running through the hair at the nape of my neck while she talks to Alice about some festival or fair she likes to go to every year.

Naturally, Jasper is eyeing me suspiciously and I'm choosing to ignore his perceptive ass.

"I'm gonna head out," I say, breaking into their conversation.

"Really?" Bella sounds disappointed, but I feel all kinds of fucked up right now. So I can't stay with her.

"Yeah. I'll call you tomorrow."

We get my coat, but I insist that she doesn't come outside because it's fucking freezing. She walks me to the door and suddenly, she doesn't seem fine.

"What's wrong, Bella?"

She shakes her head. "I'm fine. I'm tired. I'm probably going to take a shower and head to bed while you drive back."

I eye her for a moment, and she puts on a smile. I kiss her goodnight; a kiss that lasts much longer and is much deeper than it should be, trying to say I'm sorry for whatever the fuck I did before I pull away and listen for her to lock the door behind me.

Now that I think about it, I probably should have just let the fucking shit on the bench play out.

* * *

**A/N**

No meatballs were harmed in the production of this chapter. Edward is just very particular.

Thank you for reading! xx

Translations  
_Cazzo di cuoco =_ dickhead Chef

_come Dio comanda_ = as god intended (i.e the proper way in Italian)

_Baby, non e' cosa da ridere!_ = Baby, it's not funny!

_Vuole morire di vergogna_ = he wants to die of embarrassment

_Ma chi cazzo ti credi di essere?_ = Who the fuck do you think you are?


	6. Outtake 6

A/N

Outtake 6 was written for the Fandom For Preemies effort. Such a worthy cause for the wee babes.

This outtake can be inserted into Fate & Forgotten Secrets, Chapter 40: Premature Promises. It is not essential to the main plot, but it's kinda fun.

Disclaimer: I own the computer this was typed on, that is all.

* * *

**Fate & Forgotten Secrets**

**Outtake 6: Acceptance and Disposal**

**Rosalie Cullen**

I'm going to cut his cock off. I cannot believe him!

I can almost feel my claws come out, ready to tear into Edward for being such an utter asshole!

He's not the only one, though. Not by far. My so-called _friends_ are going to feel the pain as well. Everyone knows Little Monster is off limits. Yet, they completely went against my specific edict and fucked him anyway.

Fucking Tanya, I bet I know for a fact when she pounced on my brother. It had to have been that vacation we took to Alaska. It was a bunch of us and our families. I had only been modeling in the big circuit for a few years, at nineteen, my parents were still very protective of me. _Not like that has changed_.

Tanya, Irina and I started out together in the circuit and had become really close because of that; our families bonded over that as well. So it wasn't uncommon for everyone to end up spending vacations together.

I know it had to have been that trip, because of the way Tanya and Edward were suddenly being around each other. At the time, I chocked it up to the close quarters, but in hindsight, I know she fucking fucked him!

I want to go and beat their bony asses, but the hurt look on Bella's face makes me pause and choose another direction.

Edward fucked up. Again. If he keeps this shit up, he'll lose her, and I will definitely cut his cock off if he even thinks about going back to that plug and play stuff he was doing months ago. You can never truly go back to anything else once you've had a taste of what's true and right for you. I should know.

"Edward, I swear to fucking god, I'm cutting your dick off. You're such a slut!" I barely contain the volume of my voice as I approach him.

Edward looks at me with a shocked expression as Bella shifts her eyes to the ground, I notice a tear roll off her cheek and onto the grass. _Why do men never get it?_ I want to tell her not to cry over him, because he's not worth it, but I'd be lying. Edward _is_ worth it, but he can also be an unmitigated ass at times.

Before I can say anything more, an obnoxious sound starts to pierce the air, breaking the train of thought that was about to run him over.

"I wonder what that's about?" Alice is suddenly standing next to me, glancing between me, Edward and Bella and towards the front of my house. I'm making a mental note to have Emmett talk to the neighbors about their damn noise. We bought this house at the beginning of last year, with the intent of settling here once I retire. I plan to raise my kids here and I don't want to deal with inconsiderate neighbors; or they won't want to deal with me.

"Come on, Rose, let's go see." Alice starts to tug on my arm, but I'm not done with Edward and the noise can wait.

"It's probably some punk kid."

"Well, it could be a hurt punk kid, and we should make sure he's okay." I roll my eyes as Alice manages to pull me away. I finally let her, when I see Edward look to Bella and think that maybe he can fix this himself. Looking over my shoulder as Alice leads me away, I see Bella pull away from him as he tries to reach for her, and I know she'll be okay, but I'm not sure about asshat.

"I swear, my brother is a fucking idiot!"

"They'll be okay," Alice states, a perky pep in her step as she is almost hopping down the side path along my house.

"I'm not so sure, I just saw her pull away from him. That just doesn't happen to Edward."

"That's Bella's backbone growing back. Edward needs someone to keep him in line, so she'll need it. They'll be fine."

Alice seems almost unfazed by the situation and I drop it. For now.

"Honestly, I need to talk to Em-" my voice catches in my throat as my eyes catch sight of beauty.

A shiny, candy apple red, 1959 Chery Corvette is sitting at the end of my driveway. I move toward her silently, unable to take my eyes away at her shiny coat, white wash wheels and silver hardware.

"Is this, this..."

"Yeah, Rosie. It's yours," Emmett answers, knowing what I mean to ask, but can't, as I reach the driver's side where he's sitting. I notice the obnoxious horn honking has ceased.

"When?"

"I've been working on it for a while now. The guys helped." I look up into his baby blues and his eyes sparkle with his million watt smile, making my skin prickle.

"Get in," he states, opening the door and holding it so I can slide in and feel her. The soft leather of her seats and the firm leather of the steering wheel are just perfect! I rev the gas and smile at the ease of the pedal under my Weitzman and the engine purrs.

I look around and there are red "R's" stitched into the corner of each seat with a white rose vine wrapped around them. They're small enough to not be tacky, but big enough to make a statement.

"Oh my god, Em, I love her!" I whisper-shout as I turn to him.

For the second time in less than five minutes, my breath catches in my throat.

Before me is Emmett, on one knee and in his hand is an absolutely gorgeous diamond, set in an elegant white gold band and accented with the cute little baby diamonds I love. I used to call the accent stones in Esme's engagement ring baby diamonds when I was a little girl. The cut is perfect and the clarity is so clear, it almost looks like glass.

"Rosie, baby, I love you. It's been a long journey, I've taken my time to get here. Just like I took my time to make this car for you. I could never present you with less than my best and a true promise for even better. I could never give you anything less than you deserve. You have my heart and my devotion, all I ask in return is that you be my wife. Rosalie Lillian Cullen, will you marry me?"

"Yes! And I should beat your ass for making me wait this long!"

Emmett blesses me with that mega watt smile again as he slips the gorgeous ring on my finger and then picks me up in his arms to seal it with a kiss.

Applause erupts from our friends and family surrounding us and I jump, because I forgot they were there. The car, the ring, my man, all too much to concentrate on.

As they come around to give hugs and congrats, the weight of Emmett's proposal hits me and I resist rolling my eyes, because he is crazy! He is crazy to think that he has ever been anything less than everything I ever wanted for as long as forever, but he is a guy and they are so thick in the head.

I look around, but don't see Edward and Bella. A flash of anger hits me, before I push it back. My brother, as annoying, spoiled, and stubborn as he is, is my best friend and I want to share this with him. Hopefully, they're talking about whatever they need to talk about to sort out this unfortunate situation. I want to be able to congratulate him one day on a proposal well done and I want Bella to be the happy girl being spun in the air.

Coming from me, I know it's weird, but it's true. I only ever want my brother to be happy. True happiness, none of that fake shit he tries to placate himself with. And Bella has been through a lot, I don't know it all, but the pain in her eyes is clear as the diamond now wrapped around my finger. She deserves to be happy too.

She's proven to me that she loves Edward. She's not after his money, she's not only into him for sex. _That_ much was obvious from the all consuming blush on her face that night at dinner months ago. The night I outright told her to wait until she got home to fuck him and have table manners. She's good for him, keeps him level and responsible. He finally has someone to take care of, other than me and mom, that actually needs it.

Eventually, we make it back to the food, much to Emmett's pleasure and Esme has to smack his hand away from the eclairs Bella made him. He smiles sheepishly and then turns to find Bella, picking her up and giving her a bone crushing hug. I used to hate how much he would gush over her.

"Bella Bear can make a mean steak," "I had everyone over for pizza and cards, and Bella gave everyone a run for their money at poker," "Bella is learning how to knit, but she doesn't think they have enough yarn to fit my big head."

I even had moments of fear that he may have been feeling more than he was saying.

Honestly, I admit to being touched by their genuine relationship. Emmett has stated more than once that Bella is like the baby sister he never had. The one that his mother lost during labor. The one he always longed for. I don't think he cares that he met her eighteen years after he lost the first one.

Unfortunately, my attention must be diverted to less pleasant matters.

Tanya, Irina, and Claire all enter and stand off to the side, trying to look inconspicuous. That's not going to work. I brush past them, not wanting to cause a scene and upset my mother, and head towards the front door. They won't be staying long.

Just like I thought, all three of them follow behind me. We've worked together long enough for them to know when not to fuck with me. And let's be honest, we all know who runs this show.

"Rosie, look, I-"

"Save it!" I punctuate my interjection of Irina's whiny apology with a well practiced bitch brow. "What makes you think I even want to entertain your pathetic excuse for an apology?"

"But it just happened," Claire tries to reason.

"Just happened? I may be blonde, but I'm not an idiot. I've always seen the way you drool over my brother. So don't expect me to believe for one goddamn second that it _just_ happened."

"You know, Rosalie," Tanya starts with a hint of attitude, "Edward is just as guilty. He was there and he liked it."

"That's not the fucking point. You're a cradle robbing skank and I fucking told you three .!"

"We figured if he was cool with it, you'd be okay with it, too." Claire, idiot savant.

"Well, you clearly figured wrong. I explicitly said don't touch my brother, don't proposition my brother. No fucking, sucking, jerking, stroking, licking, riding, straddling, kissing, biting, pinching, my brother! If he comes on to you, walk away. I remember saying he was not even available to roll around in your fantasies. And that if I ever found out about these rules being broken, there was going to be a huge problem."

"So feel free to get the fuck out, because we're done. And this isn't over, wait until the show in Roma."

Rant over, I usher the three out the door, they are looking mildly worried, I'm pleased. I slam the door on their sorry asses and get back to my party. Revenge will be mine!

* * *

**As a short note, I want to address the concerns that I have abandoned F&FS. I can't apologize, because I haven't done anything wrong. I won't blame real life, because that implies that it's an unexpected phenomenon and it's not. It is what it is. I can say that I will complete F&FS. As with anything, these things take time. **

**I hope to see you for my next update.**

**Thank you for reading!**

**xo**


	7. Outtake 7

The outtake below did not _actually_ take place in F&FS, but what if it did? I wrote this outtake for the Fandom Against Domestic Violence. This is a cause very close to my heart and I wish I could rid the world of it.

cclore and PhoenixMP3 approve this message.

*note at the bottom*

Disclaimer: SM owns Twilight, Miley Cyrus owns Party in the U.S.A. and I own...a lot of Apple products.

* * *

**Fate & Forgotten Secrets**

**Outtake 7: Be There**

**Alice Cullen POV**

I'm super excited about today! I get to spend the whole day with Bella and she agreed to go shopping! We haven't spent much time together since moving back home after college. We've both been busy working on our careers and she's living with Mike now, doing the whole live-in-girlfriend thing. So it's rare that we just hang out nowadays and I seriously miss our girl time. When Bella called and asked if I was free on Saturday, I didn't think twice about making plans with her. When she agreed to a shopping spree, I admit to being shocked and wondering if something was wrong, but I pushed it back and figured she just missed our girl time too.

I'm bouncing impatiently in the elevator as I ride up to Bella's floor and trying not to spill our coffees - Bella's fuel. I make my way down the hall and ring the bell, waiting for someone to answer.

It's been a few seconds and I'm tired of waiting so I ring the bell again.

"Finally!" I state when the door opens, then roll my eyes when I see Mike standing there.

"Alice."

"Where's Bella?" I ask, brushing past him and making my way inside. I move down the hallway toward the kitchen, expecting to find her in there because Bella's favorite room in a house is the kitchen. I put the coffees down on the counter and just as I'm leaving the kitchen to track her down, she comes in. We both squeal like girls, which is totally okay because we are, and wrap our arms around each other in a tight hug.

"Great! You brought coffee." She breaks from our hug at the sight of the coffee on the counter and picks them both up, smelling each before deciding which one is hers.

"I couldn't really expect you to get up early on a Saturday and not bring coffee, could I? You'd be slagging around in an hour and ruining all the shopping fun!"

Bella rolls her eyes at me and we both laugh. And then Mike has to come into the kitchen and ruin everything. I can't stand him, but I tolerate him for Bella. I think she thinks she loves him or maybe that he loves her. I know it's total poppycock, but you can't actually tell people how _they_ feel. It doesn't work that way and only causes problems.

I sip my coffee and watch him sidle up to her like a snake or a weasel. No, a rat! _Ew!_ He touches her and her body stiffens for a second before she glances at him and then softens. His back is to me so I can't see his face, but whatever that was, I don't like it.

"Come on, Bells! There's a new boutique not far from here and they're saving a few pieces for us." I grab Bella's arm and pull her from behind Mike and head for the door.

"Uhm, bye!" Bella calls behind her as I push her out the door. I catch Mike giving me an evil glare as I walk out behind her. He always looks evil to me so it's no big deal. It's no secret we don't like each other. Well, it's pretty obvious why I don't like him. He's a neanderthal pig and so..._greasy_. Slippery and doesn't go away, like the kind of grease in a chip bag that just lingers on your fingers. I, on the other hand, am one of the most awesome people in the world. So I have no idea why he doesn't like me.

"We're walking?" Bella whines when we get outside.

"Oh, stop! It's a nice summer day and it's literally two blocks away."

"Sure, it's nice if you count gray as nice."

"Gray is nice. It's the only neutral color you can wear in all four seasons."

"Who knows that?" Bella laughs, falling into step next to me.

We arrive at _Charisma_ and as soon as we enter, Riley saunters over and kisses me on both cheeks. "Babycakes! I thought you were gonna stand me up on our date. Oh! And who is this?" he practically whistles when he sees Bella.

"This is Bella, my friend I told you about?"

"BFF?" he asks and I nod. "You didn't tell me BFF Bella was _goooorgeous_, Babycakes!"

"Hi," Bella whispers, trying to shrink behind me and reach out her hand to shake Riley's.

"Oh no, Gorgeous, none of that hand shaking silliness at _Charisma_," he chastises and kisses her on both cheeks. Bella blushes furiously while Riley heads off into the store. I grab Bella's hand and pull her with me as I follow Riley.

"Jesus, Ali! You said a _few_ things!" Bella all but screeches when she sees the two full racks of clothes and _necessities_ that Riley has set out for us to have fun with.

"I may have underestimated a little?" I pinch my thumb and pointer finger together to gesture at my miscalculation and Bella just lets out a roaring laugh.

"You, Mary Alice Brandon, are a lying, liar who lies!"

"Maybe, but I love you!" I say, throwing my arms around her in an obnoxiously tight hug.

"I love you more," she replies.

I've missed this. She's still not whole, not the Bella I met way back before I can ever remember, before her parents were killed. A long time ago I accepted that she may never return. But we've always been Ali and Bells and lately it hasn't been that way. She zones out a lot, like she used to in middle school and high school. She's always tired and she's flaked on me so much!

"Aw, you girls are super cute! Are we going to sing Kumbaya and eat S'mores now? I'm more of a Britney fan myself." Riley says with a hint of sarcasm.

"Shut up, sweetness, and go put some music on." I shove him away and then shove Bella into one of the curtained fitting rooms and then put some clothes in there with her. She rolls her eyes at me playfully, but I know she's going to play along. Deep down, she likes to shop. I know it, she just hasn't come to terms with it yet.

Bella and I aren't the same size, but it's close enough that there are some things we can share. Usually dresses, if they aren't tailored or custom made, which I prefer. Sometimes jeans, depending on the cut because her hips are curvier than mine and she has a couple inches on me. Rarely, we can share shirts. But it's fun tossing things back and forth between our fitting rooms to see if things fit or if I don't like it, she might.

"Oh my God! Riley, turn it up!" I scream out from my fitting room and hear Bella groan, which makes me snicker. She hates, hates, _haaaates_ this song!

"_I hopped off the plane at LAX with a dream and my cardigan. Welcome to the land of fame, excess, whoa am I gonna fit it?_" Riley sings from the front of the store.

I join in as I pull on the jeans I'm getting ready to try on. _"Jumped in my cab, here I am for the first time. Look to the right and I see the Hollywood sign. This is all so crazy, everybody seems so famous. My tummy's turnin' and I'm feelin' kinda homesick."_ I have to stop to pull the halter top over my head and I let Riley continue.

_"Too much pressure and I'm nervous. That's when the taxi man turned on the radio..."_

_"And the Jay-Z song was on..."_

_"And the Jay-Z song was on..."_

_"And the Jay-Z song was on..."_

I yank back the curtain to Bella's fitting room just as the chorus starts and I grab her arm, pulling her out into the store.

_"__So I put my hands up! They're playing my song, and the butterflies fly away. I'm noddin' my head like yeah, movin' my hips like yeah."_ I dance around her and she surprises me by joining in.

_"I got my hands up, they're playin' my song. I know I'm gonna be OK. Yeah, it's a party in the USA. Yeah, it's a party in the USA."_

We dance around as the rest of the song plays, laughing and just having a good time. Just like we used to. It's awesome! I can tell she's embarrassed, but she's also having fun. She's flushed red and smiling as we spin around like idiots and pick up random scarves to twirl around and funny hats get put on our heads by Riley. When the song ends, we tumble onto the floor trying to catch our breaths from dancing and laughing.

Before long, I scurry back into my fitting room, because the lure of the fun things in there is just too much to ignore.

"Ali, can you come undo this zipper? It's stuck," Bella calls out from a foot away.

"I bet you're pulling it the wrong way or something. Remember that time you insisted on zipping your own coat when Uncle Charlie was watching us and we were going to play in the snow? How mad you got...Bella, what the fuck is that?" I screech, stopping my trip down memory lane.

She pulls away from me, spinning her back to the wall and avoids looking at me. So not okay!

"Bella? What the hell is that? And don't tell me you walked into a door handle or one of your other clumsy moments because _that_ is a goddamn hand print!"

She looks at me then, her eyes hold tears threatening to spill over and I can see she's trying to hold back her lip as it trembles. She looks away from me again and sags onto the round chair in the fitting room. I soften my defensive stance and go sit next to her, waiting for her to talk.

I wait...

And wait...

Still waiting...

"I...can we go?"

With a super exaggerated sigh, I go back to my fitting room to get dressed. On my way, I see Riley standing close by, acting like he's dusting something, but the duster is just flicking the air. When he realizes I see him, he shrugs and moves away. I'm not mad at him. I mean, I did screech and my screeching can be loud. I _was_ a cheerleader!

Bella is waiting for me when I come out. I tell Riley I'll be back to get things and he nods in understanding, kissing our cheeks before we leave. Walking back to Bella's is silent - too silent. The elevator ride is silent, the walk to her door is silent and it's silent inside. I can't take it!

"Bella, hear me out, k?" She nods and I continue as we enter the kitchen, "I'm sorry for screeching. I love you, you're my bestest BFF ever!" I say, trying to lift the mood. That's what we used to say when we were kids when we used to hang out with Jane. It was our way of saying that Jane wasn't as important. Totally true, by the way.

"I know," she says with a small smile. "It's just..."

"What?" I urge after her pause is too long.

"It's just. I dunno, he..."

The front door closes with a bang and Bella jumps, her eyes go wide like she's been caught doing something she shouldn't be. She looks at me frantically, her eyes pleading something with me, but I don't know what.

"Good, you're back," Mike says in an entirely too sweet tone as he comes into the kitchen. "Did you buy anything sexy for me?" he asks her and my stomach rolls like I'm about to retch.

"Uhm, we didn't go to that kind of store."

"What's wrong, Bella?"

"She's just hungry. I haven't let her eat yet. We actually just came back here to grab some clothes for her because she's coming back to my house."

"Why?" he barks and Bella jumps again.

"Because she _wants_ to," I say, narrowing my eyes on him. This toolbox doesn't intimidate me one bit and if he thinks I'm letting Bella stay here tonight when she's clearly spooked, he's a total nutter!

"Do you?" he turns to Bella and asks, running a finger up and down her exposed arm and she nods.

"A girl's night will be fun," she replies softly and then smiles up at him - the fakest freaking smile I have ever seen her give. _What the hell is going on?_

She kisses his cheek and then leaves the kitchen and heads toward the bedroom to get some clothes, I guess. Not like she needs to - she has clothes at my house. But since we're playing charades, might as well act out every word.

"I don't know what's up with you, Newton, but watch yourself when it comes to Bella."

"What are you going to do, Alice? Prick me to death with a sewing needle?"

"Probably." I reply just as Bella calls from the hall that she's ready. This is so ridiculous! I am getting to the bottom of whatever is going on. It's giving me a bad, bad feeling. But everything is way too erratic to get a read on either Bella or Mike. What I do know is that he's bad for her; then again, I've always known he wasn't the one for her.

**Three months later...**

"Jasper! Something's wrong!" I shout.

All day, I've felt it. It's been wrong from the start. The air has tasted like sulfur and the world seemed to go on like something creepy was really going. A _Pee-Wee Herman_ movie or an episode of _Buffy _after she left The WB. Jasper wanted to sleep at his place like we have been a lot lately, but I said no. It just felt wrong to not be here tonight. Then I heard a car screech to a halt and I knew...

"Bella!" I scream when I reach the porch, seeing her stumble towards the house. "Bella, what are you doing here? It's late, cold and raining." There's a miserable sense of pain rolling off her in waves. I wrap my arms around her and she just starts crying. I can't make out anything she's saying. I can hear 'wrong' and 'hurt' and 'me' but that's it. Jasper reaches us and he picks Bella up into his strong arms just as she starts to sag to the ground.

"Oh my God, Bella!" I cry as her head finally drops and her entire body goes limp. I don't let go of her though. I hold onto her, just like I always will.

* * *

Hi. I guess you can see this as one of those PSA's after 80's TV shows. I'm not an expert on domestic violence, but I'm going to share my opinions with you because I've dealt with enough situations to have some.

The best thing you can do for a friend who is being abused is to be their friend. Not just when you know they've been hurt or you suspect something, but always. Be a constant in their life so they know that they have someone. If you aren't close enough to visit frequently or go out for drinks, pick up the phone, send a cute card, shoot them an email. Just be there.

Positive reinforcement works best, but be honest. Your friend will know if you're feeding them some ridiculous Rom-Com cliche when they tell you that they aren't worthy of being loved by anyone else. You can show her/him that they are loved by being consistent. Don't bash the abuser, this often sends them right back and no one wants that. Remember that they are with this person for a reason. At some point, they probably loved him/her and they might still love them. So going on and on about their bad points is not helping anyone. You're just making your friend feel stupid, which is not comforting. They'll feel even more stupid when she/he goes back to the abuser and now they can't talk to you without a diatribe. It's best to listen if they're bashing. Please trust me on this.

The cuts are not only skin deep. Every time he hits her, he breaks her spirit down more. Every time she yells at him, he feels more lost. So just because you can't see the bruise on her hip or the gash under his hair, doesn't mean they aren't being abused. So pay attention! Does your usually confident friend cower and avoid eye contact? Does your typically exuberant friend avoid contact with people? Do they rush you off the phone? What about them has changed?

No one wants to see their friends and loved ones suffer, but it is ultimately their choice to stay or go. You have to do your best to be there for them without showing your anger, without placating or being condescending. Focus on the good in them and don't be overbearing about their "bad" relationship. Be mindful of their feelings. It's their choice, but your behavior might save their life.

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**Thanks for reading**

***mwah***


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